무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How has technology changed the society?

작성자: 선*
2021-10-04 475

회원님의 영작문

Society has been developed with the technology advancing. First, technology brought convenience into society. We have various electrical devices in the house such as a refrigerator, washing machine, robot vacuum cleaner, air conditioner, dishwasher, etc. In the past, our moms had to do house chores all day by hand, but nowadays we need to push the buttons or turn on the switches to do house chores. In addition, we can control the devices out of the house through the internet to turn on or off the devices. We can do other works while machines are working instead of us in the house. So house chores don’t belong to only women any longer, but to every member of the family because anybody can operate the machine by pushing the buttons.
Second, technology brought mass manufacturing, so we can buy products at a much cheaper price than those from artisans. We go to the big markets in the cities, and we can buy what we want any time.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Sun Jung!   Your reply is the perfect answer to the given question.  Thank you for an impressive work. Keep it up.

- Debbie


Society has been developed with the technology advancing.
>> Society developed because of advanced technology. 

 First, technology brought convenience into society.
>> This is a good sentence.

 We have various electrical devices in the house such as a refrigerator, washing machine, robot vacuum cleaner, air conditioner, dishwasher, etc.
>> This is a good sentence.

 In the past, our moms had to do house chores all day by hand, but nowadays we need to push the buttons or turn on the switches to do house chores.
>> In the past, our moms had to do house chores all day by hand, but nowadays, we just need to push the buttons or turn on the switches to do house chores.

 In addition, we can control the devices out of the house through the internet to turn on or off the devices.
>> In addition, we can control the devices when we're not home. We can turn on or off the devices through the internet.

 We can do other works while machines are working instead of us in the house.
>> We can do other things while the machines are working in the house instead of us.

 So house chores don’t belong to only women any longer, but to every member of the family because anybody can operate the machine by pushing the buttons.
>> Therefore, house chores are not just for women, but  they are for every family member. It's because anybody can operate the machines by pushing the buttons.

Second, technology brought mass manufacturing, so we can buy products at a much cheaper price than those from artisans.
>> This is a good sentence.

We go to the big markets in the cities, and we can buy what we want any time.
>> This is a good sentence.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
110624 What do you think would happen if there was only one language in... 최*원 완료 2021-08-06 0
110623 7th homework 정*영 완료 2021-08-06 4
110622 Day 4 homework 남*리 완료 2021-08-06 509
110621 Homework 김*혁 완료 2021-08-06 484
110620 21/08/05 박*현 완료 2021-08-06 621
110619 What is the most difficult part of learning? why? 홍*혜 완료 2021-08-06 6
110618 Homework 6 사* 완료 2021-08-06 0
110617 Homework 5 사* 완료 2021-08-06 0
110616 Homework 4 사* 완료 2021-08-06 0
110615 My homework 전*선 완료 2021-08-06 438
110614 Is it better to express yourself in words or action? 박*하 완료 2021-08-06 656
110613 When was the last time you made a reservation and how did it go? 하*조 완료 2021-08-06 464
110612 studying english is exercise. 임*영 완료 2021-08-06 453
110611 How do you react/ respond when others gossip about you? 안*윤 완료 2021-08-05 1
110610 homework : do you think someone is a better person after they... 김*혜 완료 2021-08-05 573
110609 Can you think of a device that makes people\'s lives easier? 박*은 완료 2021-08-05 0
110608 What\'s your favorite word in English? Why do you like it? 박*은 완료 2021-08-05 0
110607 Page 4 오*은 완료 2021-08-05 405
110606 What do you think would happen if there was only one language in... 하*윤 완료 2021-08-05 501
110605 Happiness and money 이*하 완료 2021-08-05 416

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]