¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àü*¼±
2021-10-05 182

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I like to meet new people, I can experience new things, and in other cases,There are times when it's annoying to know about the people of Season's Greetings. It's hard to find new people who agree with me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Jenny!

I appreciate your sending your homework. Please read the corrections below. 
It was lovely meeting you today.  See you when I see you! 

Cheers,
Jean~~



When I like to meet new people, I can experience new things, and in other cases,There are times when it's annoying to know about the people of Season's Greetings. 
>> I like to meet new people because I can experience new things, but in other cases, there are times when it's annoying [to know about the people of Season's Greetings.] [I'm sorry but I don't understand the clause I put in a bracket so I can't edit or correct it. I just edited the first part of the sentence.] 

It's hard to find new people who agree with me.
>> It's hard to find new people who have the same interests or personality as me. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112477 If I reincarnated ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 240
112476 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 241
112475 If you can be reincarnated, what kind of life would you want on... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 259
112474 Howework ±Ç*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 1
112473 (Self-introduction) Tell me something about yourself. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 228
112472 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 193
112471 homework Æí*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 176
112470 What kind of person would be the perfect neighbor? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 2
112469 Self introduction2 ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 1
112468 Riding a bike À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 3
112467 What are your short-term and long-term goals? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 1
112466 Gaecheonjeol (National Foundation day) ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 307
112465 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 201
112464 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 4
112463 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 178
112462 Personality ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 214
112461 Homework 10.3 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 391
112460 If you can be reincarnated, what kind of life would you want on... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 1
112459 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 1
112458 Among those countries you\'ve visited, which is your favorite... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 224

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04