¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àü*¼±
2021-10-05 418

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I like to meet new people, I can experience new things, and in other cases,There are times when it's annoying to know about the people of Season's Greetings. It's hard to find new people who agree with me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Jenny!

I appreciate your sending your homework. Please read the corrections below. 
It was lovely meeting you today.  See you when I see you! 

Cheers,
Jean~~



When I like to meet new people, I can experience new things, and in other cases,There are times when it's annoying to know about the people of Season's Greetings. 
>> I like to meet new people because I can experience new things, but in other cases, there are times when it's annoying [to know about the people of Season's Greetings.] [I'm sorry but I don't understand the clause I put in a bracket so I can't edit or correct it. I just edited the first part of the sentence.] 

It's hard to find new people who agree with me.
>> It's hard to find new people who have the same interests or personality as me. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112006 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 400
112005 My answering ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 1
112004 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 4
112003 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 409
112002 School ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 519
112001 what I will good at it ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 813
112000 Can you talk about three things that scare you? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 0
111999 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 459
111998 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 1
111997 33th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 2
111996 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 1
111995 Appropriate determiner ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 344
111994 Do you think that art is important to society? why? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 403
111993 . °í*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 0
111992 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 3
111991 bellboy ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 697
111990 Do you know of any interesting ways to explore your town or city? ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 426
111989 HOMEWORK : Where do you prefer staying while on vaction ¹Ú*Âù ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 1
111988 Do you like fusion food? What restaurant would you recommend? ¼­*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 507
111987 Do you think family reunions are important? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 451

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04