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영작교정 게시판

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Nowadays culture is much the same all around the world when compared to previous times. Do you think

작성자: 황*하
2021-10-05 249

회원님의 영작문

If god created our world, we should have same culture and language because we were born from Adam according to the bible. I wonder what makes people use different languages and have various culture. I don't know how many languages are there in this world and each country has their own culture. It makes people to be curious about other culture. That's the main reason why people would like to travel another countries. I guess that they also want to know about culture in various nations. Cultural differences provide curiosity to the people. However, it causes a lot of conflicts among the countries. Religion issues are major problem our world has. September 11 attacks are related with religion issues. If world has same culture, there aren't these problems but it could be boring. Globalization has changed our life. We can easily meet foreigners and work together. As a results, many people have been suffering from learning other languages. So, they have dreamed to have only one language.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Mr. Hwang! ^^ Thanks for doing you essay! Have a great time!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
If god created our world, we should have same culture and language because we were born from Adam according to the bible. 
>>> If God created the world, we should have the same culture and language because we were born from Adam according to the bible. 
I wonder what makes people use different languages and have various culture.
>>> CORRECT
 I don't know how many languages are there in this world and each country has their own culture.
>>> CORRECT
 It makes people be curious about other culture. 
>>> CORRECT
That's the main reason why people would like to travel to another countries.
>>> CORRECT
 I guess that they also want to know about culture in various nations.
>>>  I guess, they also want to know about the culture in various nations. 
Cultural differences provide curiosity to the people.
>>> CORRECT
 However, it causes a lot of conflicts among the countries.
>>> CORRECT
 Religion issues are major problems our world has. 
>>> CORRECT
September 11 attacks are related with religion issues. 
>>> CORRECT
If world has same culture, there aren't these problems but it could be boring. 
>>> If the world has the same culture, there aren't these problems but it could be boring. 
>>> CORRECT
Globalization has changed our life. 
>>> CORRECT
We can easily meet foreigners and work together. 
>>> CORRECT
As a result, many people have been suffering from learning other languages. 
>>> CORRECT
So, they have dreamed to have only one language.
>>> CORRECT
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