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What does it take to keep an eye on something well? (What it takes - the skills and personality need

작성자: 류*선
2021-10-14 427

회원님의 영작문

It takes to keep on eye on my baby well, I need to pay attention to her first. Especially since she cannot still speak well yet, I always have to check her needs and feelings. I always try to imagine that if I were her. So I can catch her needs faster than my husband. However, It's not enough. I need to keep observing and studying her development because she keeps growing up. Second, I have to be healthy because it is so labor demanding. When I'm extremely tired, it's hard to take care of my baby. Also, I could lose my smile. When I'm a happy mom, my daughter also can feel happy. Third, As I observed her growth, I thought about what I was growing up. I want to show my daughter my growth. Even though I don't speak English well now, I try to study English every night during her sleep. The reason is that I want to converse with her in English deeply. As much as I can, I will do my best for her. In the future, I want to tell her about your mom's growing story.
Thank you so much! Faith!

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Great job, Jane! Your daughter must be so happy reading this if she has a chance in the future!-Faith-
It takes to keep on eye on my baby well, I need to pay attention to her first. 
>> It takes my full attention to keep an eye on my baby well.
Especially since she cannot still speak well yet, I always have to check her needs and feelings. 
>> Most especially that she cannot still speak well yet, I always have to check her needs and feelings. 
I always try to imagine that if I were her. So I can catch her needs faster than my husband. 
>> I always try to imagine that I were her so I could catch her needs faster than my husband. 
OR I always put myself in her shoes so I could catch her needs faster than my husband. 
However, It's not enough. 
>> CORRECT
I need to keep observing and studying her development because she keeps growing up. 
>> First, I need to keep observing and studying her development because she keeps growing up. 
Second, I have to be healthy because it is so labor demanding. 
>> Second, I have to be healthy because it is so labor demanding. 
When I'm extremely tired, it's hard to take care of my baby. 
>> CORRECT
OR When I'm worn out, it's hard to take care of my baby. 
Also, I could lose my smile. 
>> CORRECT
When I'm a happy mom, my daughter also can feel happy. 
>> CORRECT
Third, As I observed her growth, I thought about what I was growing up. 
>> Third, as I observe her growth, I thought about what I was growing up. 
I want to show my daughter my growth. 
>> CORRECT
Even though I don't speak English well now, I try to study English every night during her sleep. 
>> Even though I can't speak English well now, I try to study English every night during her sleep. 
The reason is that I want to converse with her in English deeply. 
>> The reason is that I want to converse with her in English deeply someday. 
As much as I can, I will do my best for her. 
>> CORRECT
In the future, I want to tell her about your mom's growing story.
In the future, I want to tell her about her mom's English development story.
Thank you so much! Faith!
>> CORRECT
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