¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your fears and how are you going to overcome them?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-10-14 417

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I had a lot of fears when I was younger than now.
And it was just about small things like a fear about monster or somethings like that.
But now, I don't have those kinds of fears.
Just I have a little fear about some insects or bees.
Now I am thinking that I was so strange because I just had a fear about monsters.
So I thought that those of fears are just useless things in my life.
But I recognized that we can grow with those fears.
If I don't had any fears, than I think I was not able to be me.
So I had those kinds of fears when I was young, and I think fears are very neccessary things in my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John :)

Fear and anxiety can last for a short time and then pass, but they can also last much longer and you can get stuck with them. In some cases they can take over your life, affecting your ability to eat, sleep, concentrate, travel, enjoy life, or even leave the house or go to work or school. This can hold you back from doing things you want or need to do, and it also affects your health.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I had a lot of fears when I was younger than now.
>> I had a lot of fears when I was younger. 

And it was just about small things like a fear about monster or somethings like that.
>> Most of them are small things like fear of monsters. Something like that. 

But now, I don't have those kinds of fears.
>> CORRECT

Just I have a little fear about some insects or bees.
>> Just I have a little fear for insects. 

Now I am thinking that I was so strange because I just had a fear about monsters.
>> Now that I am thinking about it, I feel silly because I had a fear for monsters. 

So I thought that those of fears are just useless things in my life.
>> So I thought, those fears are useless. 

But I recognized that we can grow with those fears.
>> I recognize now that we can grow with our fears. 

If I don't had any fears, than I think I was not able to be me.
>> If I didn't have any fears before, I wouldn't be the person that I am today. 

So I had those kinds of fears when I was young, and I think fears are very neccessary things in my life.
>> So the fears that I had in my life before are necessary for the life that I have right now. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112794 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 6
112793 Which house can you say is comfortable? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 213
112792 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 177
112791 What do you think is the deadliest disease? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 2
112790 I don\'t want to be a knight ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 690
112789 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 215
112788 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 213
112787 To save the Earth ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 233
112786 0112 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 2
112785 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 1
112784 4 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 178
112783 58 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 214
112782 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 221
112781 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 224
112780 Writing ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 1
112779 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 293
112778 homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 3
112777 Ideal job. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 1
112776 What do you think is the hardest part about being a student?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 221
112775 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-12 253

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04