¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

There will be second earth in space

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-10-14 181

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think we have to study about space. The resources of earth will disappear someday. Then human have to find some planet to live. Planet is in the space. Then we have to study about space to find the planet to live. Examples of we have to study are the way to go to space, space's dangers, lots of planets and many things. In conclusion, we have to study about space to prepare the New Earth.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel! Your homework is well-organized and easy to understand. You were able to use good expressions. Keep it up! 

- Teacher Debbie


I think we have to study about space.
>> This is a good sentence! 

The resources of earth will disappear someday.
>> This is a good sentence! 

Then human have to find some planet to live.
>> Then humans would have to find some planet where they could live.

Planet is in the space. 
>>  Planets are in space.

Then we have to study about space to find the planet to live. 
>> Therefore, we have to study about it to know where we could live.

Examples of we have to study are the way to go to space, space's dangers, lots of planets and many things.
>>  Here are some of the things we have to study: ways to go to space, its dangers, planets, etc.

In conclusion, we have to study about space to prepare the New Earth.
>> This is a good sentence! 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112981 Do you like eating out in a restaurant? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 226
112980 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 190
112979 How do you see yourself 5 years from now? Share your thoughts in... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 214
112978 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 213
112977 I want to change this in Korean culture. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 195
112976 What is your favorite room in your house? Why? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 1
112975 Dinosaurs ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 204
112974 Have you ever been in a difficult situation while traveling? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 0
112973 how to help friends ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 194
112972 What was your dream job? Why did you like it? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 179
112971 Do you think people who have cosmetic surgery are always happy... Á¶*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 218
112970 What is the hardest part about parenting ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 199
112969 If you can change something in the culture in South Korea, what... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 186
112968 If you can change something in the culture in South Korea, what... ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 401
112967 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 1
112966 homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 227
112965 wealth ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 1689
112964 Why is English fluency significant for you? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 201
112963 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 16
112962 Homework day2 Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04