¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Has your hometown changed a lot since you were a kid? If so, how? Have the changes been for the bett

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-10-15 246

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Actually, my hometown is the city where I am living now.
It is a neighbor city of Seoul city, so there are a lot of amenities since the city was built.
Planty of things were changed in the city, but those are just small things.
My hometown is a city, and there are a lot of amenities.
This fact didn't change and most fact about them are same as before.
Many friends talk about the change of their hometown.
And when I was a kid, I just envied it.
But now, I think it is very nice to ge my hometown as a city.
It doesn't change that much, and I think it is good for me.
Of course, there are a few problems of living in a city.
But I think we can figure them oust, and we should.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:)

Your hometown is the place which holds countless happy memories of your childhood and youthAt some point, many things will change.  Some are good and some are bad. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Actually, my hometown is the city where I am living now.
>> CORRECT

It is a neighbor city of Seoul city, so there are a lot of amenities since the city was built.
>> It is a neighbor city of Seoul so there are a lot of amenities since the city was built.

Planty of things were changed in the city, but those are just small things.
>> Plenty of things has changed in the city, but only minimal ones. 

My hometown is a city, and there are a lot of amenities.
>> My hometown is a city that has a lot of amenities.

This fact didn't change and most fact about them are same as before.
>> This fact didn't change and is still the same as before. 

Many friends talk about the change of their hometown.
>> Many friends talk about the changes in their hometown.

And when I was a kid, I just envied it.
>> CORRECT

But now, I think it is very nice to ge my hometown as a city.
>> But now, I think it is very nice to be in my hometown. 

It doesn't change that much, and I think it is good for me.
>> It didn't change that much but I think it is good for me.

Of course, there are a few problems of living in a city.
>> Of course there are a few problems when we live in a city. 

But I think we can figure them oust, and we should.
>> But I think we can figure them out. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112459 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 1
112458 Among those countries you\'ve visited, which is your favorite... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 228
112457 How different is North Korea from South Korea nowadays? Explain... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 1
112456 What makes a person insecure? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 2
112455 33 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 226
112454 10.01 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-02 1
112453 Me ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-02 0
112452 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-02 0
112451 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-02 0
112450 Late and absent in work À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-02 233
112449 The world should have only one government rather than a national... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-02 216
112448 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 338
112447 What do you think about counseling when you have a problem?... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 1
112446 If you can be reincarnated, what kind of life would you want on... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 216
112445 How are your computer skills and what programs are you... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 254
112444 When you travel would you rather go to a place where there are a... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 427
112443 One of thing that robot can\'t: kindness ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 254
112442 Self introduction ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 2
112441 How can you judge what is the right amount of stress for you? ·ù*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 249
112440 What thing do you remember when you hear about your hometown? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-01 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04