¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Has your hometown changed a lot since you were a kid? If so, how? Have the changes been for the bett

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-10-15 440

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Actually, my hometown is the city where I am living now.
It is a neighbor city of Seoul city, so there are a lot of amenities since the city was built.
Planty of things were changed in the city, but those are just small things.
My hometown is a city, and there are a lot of amenities.
This fact didn't change and most fact about them are same as before.
Many friends talk about the change of their hometown.
And when I was a kid, I just envied it.
But now, I think it is very nice to ge my hometown as a city.
It doesn't change that much, and I think it is good for me.
Of course, there are a few problems of living in a city.
But I think we can figure them oust, and we should.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:)

Your hometown is the place which holds countless happy memories of your childhood and youthAt some point, many things will change.  Some are good and some are bad. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Actually, my hometown is the city where I am living now.
>> CORRECT

It is a neighbor city of Seoul city, so there are a lot of amenities since the city was built.
>> It is a neighbor city of Seoul so there are a lot of amenities since the city was built.

Planty of things were changed in the city, but those are just small things.
>> Plenty of things has changed in the city, but only minimal ones. 

My hometown is a city, and there are a lot of amenities.
>> My hometown is a city that has a lot of amenities.

This fact didn't change and most fact about them are same as before.
>> This fact didn't change and is still the same as before. 

Many friends talk about the change of their hometown.
>> Many friends talk about the changes in their hometown.

And when I was a kid, I just envied it.
>> CORRECT

But now, I think it is very nice to ge my hometown as a city.
>> But now, I think it is very nice to be in my hometown. 

It doesn't change that much, and I think it is good for me.
>> It didn't change that much but I think it is good for me.

Of course, there are a few problems of living in a city.
>> Of course there are a few problems when we live in a city. 

But I think we can figure them oust, and we should.
>> But I think we can figure them out. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111571 What keeps you busy during a long trip? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-09-03 406
111570 How do you refresh your mind throughout the workday? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-03 539
111569 9.2 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-03 1
111568 Homework: What do you think is the hardest job in the world and... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-03 509
111567 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 691
111566 Journal ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 464
111565 Have you ever felt proud of making a mistake? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 1
111564 What makes you unhappy? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 3
111563 Who do you think was the best president of South Korea and why? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 423
111562 Homework(*^-^*) Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 372
111561 What do you think is the hardest job in the world and why? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 369
111560 Exercise is secret of my health. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 386
111559 Do you prefer working alone or with others? Why? Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 1
111558 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 464
111557 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 3
111556 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 443
111555 21 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 340
111554 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 372
111553 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 1
111552 What do you think is the hardest job in the world and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 311

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04