¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What to do after retirement.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Çù
2021-10-15 202

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don,t know when my retirement wil be, but i want to design and build my own house after retirement.
Now i am designing highrise buildings,complex building and road and tunnel for others.
I surely want to build my own a little house even my own village to live.
I will enjoy happy life with our families and invite my friends there. I will invite you too.
.
.
This is out of our topics. What i want to told this to you.
I am trying to get English grammer corrections and improve my English abillities through this short class.
Also i think i can learn not only this but also many things from you.
I hop you also feel a lot through this class.
I hope you to communicate with many people and understand Koreans and know Korean culture through
even this short class and future our essay (homework ¤Ì¤Ì)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Evan! :)

Retirement is what you make it. If you¡¯re sitting and wondering what to do when retired and bored, it may be a relief to know that there are plenty of options out there and yours is actually a good suggestion. :) 

PS: Yes, we can discuss a lot of things about the Korean culture. Actually, I have a lot of things to share as well. :) We can do that on our next discussion. Thanks for giving me these ideas. 

PS: Thank you so much for considering to invite me to your house as well. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don,t know when my retirement wil be, but i want to design and build my own house after retirement.
>> I don't know when I will retire but I want to design and build my own house when that comes. 

Now i am designing highrise buildings,complex building and road and tunnel for others.
>> Now, I am designing high-rise buildings, complex buildings, roads and tunnel for others.

I surely want to build my own a little house even my own village to live.
>> I surely want to build my own little house even my own village to live in. 

I will enjoy happy life with our families and invite my friends there. 
>> I will enjoy a happy life with my family and invite my friends there. 

I will invite you too.
>> CORRECT (Thank you so much! :) )

-

This is out of our topics. What i want to told this to you.
>> This is our of our topic and I want to tell this to you. 

I am trying to get English grammer corrections and improve my English abillities through this short class.
>> I am trying to get English grammar corrections and improve my English abilities through these short classes.

Also i think i can learn not only this but also many things from you.
>> Also I think I can learn not only this, but also many things from you.

I hop you also feel a lot through this class.
>> I hope you also feel the same way about this class. 

I hope you to communicate with many people and understand Koreans and know Korean culture through 
even this short class and future our essay (homework ¤Ì¤Ì)
>> I hope you communicate with many people and understand Koreans and know our culture even through these short classes and future essays. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113594 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 477
113593 What are working conditions like in your country? Á¶*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 190
113592 How would you describe the difference between a vice and an... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 234
113591 How often do you eat chicken? Do you think chicken is healthy? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 348
113590 Where does most of South Korea\\\'s GDP come from? ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 2
113589 What website do you often use and why? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 737
113588 My favorite website ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 237
113587 If you could change anything in your life, what would it be? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 1
113586 What website do you often use and why? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 253
113585 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 2
113584 1. What is hoarding? 2. Are you a hoarder? Tell me why. ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 198
113583 Kindly answer the following in essay form. What website do you... ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-05 3
113582 Homework from the lesson 11042021 Á¶*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 227
113581 Is there such a thing as \"unbiased reporting? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 171
113580 What are three things that motivate you? ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 207
113579 Homework ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 182
113578 Essay ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 142
113577 What website do you often use and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 0
113576 Tell me about the best vacation you\'ve ever had. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 0
113575 Most Important attitude at work ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 291

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04