¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change something in the culture in South Korea, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*È£
2021-10-18 387

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In South Korea, we usually respect for older people because they have a lot of age. But I think that is not good culture. Because I know that there are a lot of great people who already got a lot of age but there are some people who just want to be respect from the other people even they did nothing or bad things.So I think our culture should be changed into respecting all guy without getting age.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kyoung-Ho! :)

Korea's culture is actually great. But like any other cultures, it also has flaws. Some people want to prolong it and some don't. It is always different based on people's perspectives. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In South Korea, we usually respect for older people because they have a lot of age. 
>> In South Korea, we usually respect the elderly people. 

But I think that is not good culture. 
>> CORRECT

Because I know that there are a lot of great people who already got a lot of age but there are some people who just want to be respect from the other people even they did nothing or bad things.
>> There are a lot of elderly people who did a lot great things but there are some who still want to be respected because of their age regardless if they did something bad or did nothing. 

So I think our culture should be changed into respecting all guy without getting age.
>> So I think this culture of ours should be changed to respect the ones that are worth respected to. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113033 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 169
113032 Busy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 1
113031 homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 221
113030 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 195
113029 What do you prefer when you\'re studying, a small room, an open... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 1
113028 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 1
113027 Tuesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 197
113026 Describe your best friends. How do they look like? What are... ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 4
113025 16 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 152
113024 24 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 145
113023 20 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 160
113022 homework Æí*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 181
113021 My hair ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 168
113020 home work ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 160
113019 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 1
113018 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 3
113017 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 2
113016 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 2
113015 What do you think is the worst crime a person could commit? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 0
113014 If you could recommend one way to learn English fast to a new... ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-19 178

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04