¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change something in the culture in South Korea, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*È£
2021-10-18 660

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In South Korea, we usually respect for older people because they have a lot of age. But I think that is not good culture. Because I know that there are a lot of great people who already got a lot of age but there are some people who just want to be respect from the other people even they did nothing or bad things.So I think our culture should be changed into respecting all guy without getting age.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kyoung-Ho! :)

Korea's culture is actually great. But like any other cultures, it also has flaws. Some people want to prolong it and some don't. It is always different based on people's perspectives. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In South Korea, we usually respect for older people because they have a lot of age. 
>> In South Korea, we usually respect the elderly people. 

But I think that is not good culture. 
>> CORRECT

Because I know that there are a lot of great people who already got a lot of age but there are some people who just want to be respect from the other people even they did nothing or bad things.
>> There are a lot of elderly people who did a lot great things but there are some who still want to be respected because of their age regardless if they did something bad or did nothing. 

So I think our culture should be changed into respecting all guy without getting age.
>> So I think this culture of ours should be changed to respect the ones that are worth respected to. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112106 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 511
112105 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 0
112104 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 0
112103 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 698
112102 What do you think is the perfect thing to do this upcoming long... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112101 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112100 Which one do you think is better, being a boss or being a... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 600
112099 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 585
112098 Do you visit museums when you go to another city? Why or why not? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112097 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 751
112096 Even though doctors advise old people to get more exercise, many... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 442
112095 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1034
112094 HW ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 2
112093 School ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 601
112092 Do you mind rumors? Why or why not? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 475
112091 What programs do you usually watch on TV? À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1014
112090 People generally know that the environment is important.... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 980
112089 Homework ÀÌ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112088 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112087 What do you like about studying? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 443

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04