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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework from the lesson 10192021

작성자: 조*비
2021-10-20 173

회원님의 영작문



Oct 19 2021
Homework: Is traveling a luxury or a necessity?

People travel for different reasons. Some are obligated to travel because their jobs need them to, while others will deliberately make time and money to travel. So it can be said traveling is an obligation to some people while other people see it as a luxurious way of spending their free time. When it comes to traveling for leisure, however, I’d say it is more of a luxury than a necessity.
The main reason that makes me think traveling as a luxury is that it’s generally made with two main ingredients, time and money. People come from different financial backgrounds, and you see the difference between the poor and the rich as young as a kindergartener. While human beings are said to be the animal of curiosity, for some people this instinct is something that cannot be satisfied by actual experiences. Take one class of students in a middle school in Korea for instance.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Eunbee!  You have answered the question appropriately.  The overall content of your work is comprehensible.  Be careful with word usage though.  

- Debbie


Oct. 19 2021
Homework: Is traveling a luxury or a necessity?

People travel for different reasons.
>> This is a good sentence.

Some are obligated to travel because their jobs need them to, while others will deliberately make time and money to travel. 
>> Some are obligated to travel because of their jobs, while others deliberately make time and money to travel. 

So it can be said traveling is an obligation to some people while other people see it as a luxurious way of spending their free time.
>> Therefore, traveling is an obligation to some people, while to others it is a luxurious way of spending their free time.

When it comes to traveling for leisure, however, I’d say it is more of a luxury than a necessity.
>> However, when it comes to leisure travel, I’d say it is more of a luxury than a necessity.

The main reason that makes me think traveling as a luxury is that it’s generally made with two main ingredients, time and money.
>> In my opinion, the main reason traveling is a luxury is that it needs two important things -time and money.

People come from different financial backgrounds, and you see the difference between the poor and the rich as young as a kindergartener. 
>> This is a good sentence.

While human beings are said to be the animal of curiosity, for some people this instinct is something that cannot be satisfied by actual experiences. 
>> While human beings are innately curious, for some people, this quality is something that cannot be satisfied by actual experiences. 

Take one class of students in a middle school in Korea for instance.
>> Take one class of students in a middle school in Korea, for instance.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
113193 Do you spend money on your hobby? 노*이 완료 2021-10-23 2
113192 homework 김*연 완료 2021-10-23 241
113191 Not to be included important information 유*진 완료 2021-10-23 241
113190 Journal 류*선 완료 2021-10-23 231
113189 Which is better: dating for a short time or a long time before... 안*윤 완료 2021-10-22 2
113188 Do you think there would be less illness in the future? 윤*영 완료 2021-10-22 258
113187 Homework 강*림 완료 2021-10-22 1
113186 Fill in the blanks with suitable prepositional phrases 선* 완료 2021-10-22 189
113185 My dad 권*진 완료 2021-10-22 203
113184 I want to be strong and healthy 김*우 완료 2021-10-22 224
113183 Homework 강*림 완료 2021-10-22 2
113182 Homework 강*림 완료 2021-10-22 4
113181 Homework 김*윤 완료 2021-10-22 152
113180 Politicians before election day. 박*협 완료 2021-10-22 200
113179 The reason to study English well. 박*협 완료 2021-10-22 204
113178 e-mail correction 박*광 완료 2021-10-22 2
113177 e-mail correction 박*광 완료 2021-10-22 3
113176 e-mail correction 박*광 완료 2021-10-22 4
113175 What kind of activity do you want to try to be more fit than now? 이*람 완료 2021-10-22 2
113174 HOMEWORK: Do you would be a great leader? (why/why not) 손*형 완료 2021-10-22 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

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지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

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03
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04

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