¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Human beings are being judged according to their social status and material possession. Old fashione

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-10-20 540

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The appearance is the first thing people check when they meet others after that, they have time to know each other. People try to figure out social status, age and economic ability because they would like to act differently according to those values. I guess that most people would like to be happy by doing what they like but to do it, sadly, money is the thing people have to consider. It's almost impossible to achieve someone's goal without money. Foe instance, learning sports, studying specific subjects and taking a trip need to spend huge money. I think people want to be a friend with someone who are rich, smart or might be helpful for themselves. It is common sense that high position people in the society are usually rich because they have a lot of job opportunities and various way to make money. Although, all people know that old fashion values are important and want to follow it, people think that money is the most important factor for their happy life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang! ^^ How are you today? Oooh, that sounds typical. kkk Thanks for doing your homework! Have a nice Thursday!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The appearance is the first thing people check when they meet others after that, they have time to know each other. 
>>> Appearance is the first thing people check when they meet others, after that, they get to know each other. 
People try to figure out social status, age and economic ability because they would like to act differently according to those values. 
>>> CORRECT
I guess that most people would like to be happy by doing what they like but to do it, sadly, money is the thing people have to consider.
>>> CORRECT
 It's almost impossible to achieve someone's goal without money.
>>> CORRECT
 Foe instance, learning sports, studying specific subjects and taking a trip need to spend huge money.
>>>  For instance, learning sports, studying specific subjects and taking a trip requires huge money.
 I think people want to be a friend with someone who are rich, smart or might be helpful for themselves. 
>>>  I think people want to be a friend of someone who are rich, smart or might be helpful for themselves. 
It is common sense that high position people in the society are usually rich because they have a lot of job opportunities and various way to make money.
>>> It is a common sense that high position people in the society are usually rich because they have a lot of job opportunities and have various ways to make money.
 Although, all people know that old fashion values are important and want to follow it, people think that money is the most important factor for their happy life.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112554 Musical\'s dis/advantage. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 900
112553 love ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 533
112552 Homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 369
112551 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 459
112550 discussion boards on the Internet! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 408
112549 My family\'s vacation ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 493
112548 41 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 876
112547 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 331
112546 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 2
112545 Make 5 sentences to describe your bedroom and post it on the... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 405
112544 Crimes3 ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 1
112543 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 1
112542 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 338
112541 Are there any problems with jellyfish or sharks at your local... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 1
112540 are these correct? °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 508
112539 What kind of business do you think would be successful during... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 312
112538 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 483
112537 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 1
112536 Nowadays culture is much the same all around the world when... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 406
112535 HOMEWORK: Choose the right word. Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-05 401

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04