¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your bad behaviors and how are you going to change them?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-10-20 528

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't usually do this but I sometimes speak bad words to other people.
If I get surprise or if I had unlucky or angry events, then I speak bad words.
But I think I can stop speaking bad words when I had unlucky or angry events because what I have to do is just control my emotions.
The problem is I can't stop speaking bad words when I get surprised about something.
It is very hard to stop because it became one of my habits.
So I think if I want to stop it, I have to use right words and I shouldn't think about the bad words.
The reason that I am speaking bad words is it became one of my habits.
So I have to have a new great habit that speaking right words to other people.
If I keep doing it, it will be my habit so I think I can fix speaking bad words.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:)

Bad habits interrupt your life and prevent you from accomplishing your goals. They jeopardize your health - both mentally and physically. And they waste your time and energy.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


I don't usually do this but I sometimes speak bad words to other people.
>> I don't usually do this but I sometimes say bad words to other people.

If I get surprise or if I had unlucky or angry events, then I speak bad words.
>> If I get surprise or something unlucky happens, I curse. 

But I think I can stop speaking bad words when I had unlucky or angry events because what I have to do is just control my emotions.
>> Sometimes I can't help but do it because I can't control my emotions. 

The problem is I can't stop speaking bad words when I get surprised about something.
>> The problem is that I do it unconsciously. 

It is very hard to stop because it became one of my habits.
>> CORRECT

So I think if I want to stop it, I have to use right words and I shouldn't think about the bad words.
>> So I think if I want to stop it, I have to use the right words and I shouldn't think about bad words.

The reason that I am speaking bad words is it became one of my habits.
>> The reason behind this is because it has become one of my habits. 

So I have to have a new great habit that speaking right words to other people.
>> So I need to come up with a new good habit. 

If I keep doing it, it will be my habit so I think I can fix speaking bad words.
>> If I keep doing it, it will be my habit so I think I can fix this bad one. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115464 homework Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 2
115463 Korea locks in COVID19 pills for 1m people ; here\'s what to know À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 1
115462 What things are irreplaceable? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 1671
115461 What things are irreplaceable? ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 331
115460 Essay (Jan 11th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 692
115459 > What do you enjoy doing with friends? ÇÑ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 496
115458 sudsidies ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 362
115457 What are some famous places to visit in your birthplace? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 901
115456 What do you do to make yourself fit and healthy? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 506
115455 homework ¹®*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 684
115454 Some people get into debt by buying things they don¡¯t need and... ¹®*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 3
115453 What is your favorite holiday? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 1
115452 2022.1.10 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 972
115451 If you have a chance of going out with your friends, where do... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 1
115450 What advice do you have for people who want to study English? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-11 0
115449 01.10 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 1
115448 Panic attack ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 1013
115447 When was the happiest day of your life? Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 705
115446 homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 1038
115445 Life without weekend will be terrible ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 430

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04