¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Thursday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-10-21 641

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:How can houses be made more environmentally friendly?
A:People should not use plastic when they are making house or living in a house.
Plastic can need more then hundred thousand years to be one hundred percent rotted.
Also, if they have a cow or sheep in there house or farm, then they can give them sea weeds instead of grass.
Then they can make less methane, so it can be help to stop air pollution before the earths' temperature gets really high.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


People should not use plastic when they are making house or living in a house.

>> People should not use plastic when they are making a house or living in a house.
Plastic can need more then hundred thousand years to be one hundred percent rotted.

>> Plastic needs more than a hundred thousand years to rot one hundred percent.
Also, if they have a cow or sheep in there house or farm, then they can give them sea weeds instead of grass.

>> Also, if they have a cow or sheep in their house or farm, then they can give them sea weeds instead of grass.
Then they can make less methane, so it can be help to stop air pollution before the earths' temperature gets really high.

>> Then they can make less methane, so it can be helpful in stopping air pollution before the earths' temperature gets really high.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113075 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 2
113074 Homework {10/20} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 327
113073 What are your bad behaviors and how are you going to change them? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 320
113072 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 315
113071 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 1
113070 What food do you always order online? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 412
113069 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 683
113068 Human beings are being judged according to their social status... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 501
113067 musical instrument ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 369
113066 what I will wear in my school ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 316
113065 My bad behaviors ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 318
113064 What are your hopes before this year ends? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 977
113063 What are your bad behaviors and how are you going to change them? ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 344
113062 How to response to customer À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 303
113061 sad ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 349
113060 Dinosaurs ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 266
113059 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 1
113058 Today\'s homework Ȳ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 4
113057 Writing Task: What would you say is the best thing about the... ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 2
113056 What are your bad behaviors and how are you going to change them? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-20 369

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04