¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Should we try to make life as uncomfortable as possible for people in jail?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼±*
2021-10-21 511

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think so. Who goes to prison? Always, someone who did something wrong is sent to prison, and then they need to pay for what they did. That¡¯s why prisons were set up and the prisoner spend time regretting his wrongdoing. It means that prisoners don¡¯t need to have comfortable jail, Through this punishment, the prisoner has to know how harshly he would be treated when he breaks the rules or hurts others in society. If they stay at the prison comfortably, they are never afraid to be back to the prions at all times. In case, they will commit crimes over and over, and it is like a vicious circle of disorder. To campaign those criminals, the prison should be the harsh areas.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Sun Jung,
Thank you so much for articulating your opinions!
Have an exceptional Friday and a great weekend!
Teacher Elly.
Should we try to make life as uncomfortable as possible for people in jail?
Yes, I think so. 
CORRECT!
or>>Yes, this is my opinion.
Who goes to prison? 
CORRECT!
or>>Who should go to prison? 
Always, someone who did something wrong is sent to prison, and then they need to pay for what they did. 
>>It's always the person who did something wrong who should be sent to prison. Because they need to pay for what they did. 
That¡¯s why prisons were set up and the prisoner spend time regretting his wrongdoing. 
>>That¡¯s why prisons were set up where the prisoners will spend their time regretting their wrongdoings. 
It means that prisoners don¡¯t need to have comfortable jail, 
>>It means that the prisoners aren't comfortable when they're in jail. 
Through this punishment, the prisoner has to know how harshly he would be treated when he breaks the rules or hurts others in society. 
>>Through punishment, the prisoner has to know how harshly he would be treated when he breaks the rules or when he hurts people within the society. 
If they stay at the prison comfortably, they are never afraid to be back to the prions at all times. 
>>If they stay inside the prison comfortably, they will never be afraid to go back to prison several times. 
In case, they will commit crimes over and over, and it is like a vicious circle of disorder. 
>>When they start committing a crime, it will become like a vicious cycle that repeats itself over and over again, which then will turn to a disorder. 
To campaign those criminals, the prison should be the harsh areas.
>>To do a campaign against those criminals, the prison should be a harsh area for them.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115419 ESSAY: Some claim that men are naturally more competitive than... ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 625
115418 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 2
115417 What traditions do you have in your country in welcoming a new... ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 902
115416 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 4
115415 Is vaccine pass justifed? Seould court has doubts À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 1
115414 sudsidy ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 864
115413 Describe your ideal house. How does it look like? ÇÑ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 581
115412 What do you think is the top 3 food that can be best eaten... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 696
115411 Some claim that men are naturally more competitive than women.... ¹®*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 1
115410 homework ¹Ú*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 968
115409 What is an alcoholic? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-01-10 1
115408 Homework (1/7) ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 2
115407 What do you think should be done to improve the living... ±è*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 905
115406 When people are wealthy or successful, do they have a special... ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 0
115405 What are the best ways to make a good first impression? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 689
115404 My ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 1
115403 Homeless ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 1337
115402 Prepare for my audition and interview ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 764
115401 homework ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 0
115400 Tell Me About a Time You Demonstrated Leadership Skills. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-09 565

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04