¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My hardest problem in my life

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-10-22 338

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My hardest problem is relationship with other people.
Every people have different personality.
I think my personality is positive and energetic.
So sometime other people, they feeling to me uncomfortable and so high tension.
But they are very few people.
In my opinion, my personality's most important thing is friendship.
When I fight other person or friends, I feel so uncomfortable.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:)

Challenges and problems are important parts of life that give you experiences, make you learn and help you to become wiser and stronger. Problems make us grow and shape us. The biggest problem people have is that they hope for a life without problems. Regardless of the result, value the experience and personal growth.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

My hardest problem is relationship with other people.
>>My hardest problem is building relationships with other people.

Every people have different personality.
>> Every person has different personalities. 

I think my personality is positive and energetic.
>> I think my personality is that I am positive and energetic.

So sometime other people, they feeling to me uncomfortable and so high tension.
>> So for some people, they sometimes feel uncomfortable when I show these personalities of mine. 

But they are very few people.
>> But it only happens to a few people. 

In my opinion, my personality's most important thing is friendship.
>> In my opinion, our personalities are very important roles in friendship. 

When I fight other person or friends, I feel so uncomfortable.
>> When I fight with other my friends or other people, I feel so uncomfortable.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111524 Do you enjoy learning about other countries¡¯ customs? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 353
111523 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 271
111522 Homework ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 12
111521 I\'m not sure about this, but I did my best~^^ ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-02 240
111520 I love fruity smells>< It feels so fresh!! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 237
111519 9.1 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 1
111518 What is the importance of a healthy diet? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 1
111517 What comes/springs to your mind when you hear the expression... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 173
111516 What do solutions basically do in systems? Share your answer in... ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 239
111515 Homework (312) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 230
111514 Life without friends ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 244
111513 page 25 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 265
111512 Hi Kate! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 8
111511 fun learning ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 262
111510 Way do you need a friend? Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 1
111509 What benefits are there to countries who accept refugees? °í*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 258
111508 page 21 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 205
111507 Who do you think was the best president of South Korea and why? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 316
111506 Acheve a goal Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 226
111505 Practice The \'to-v\' ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-09-01 441

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04