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Please correct the sentence I made

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2021-10-27 222

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I had a great time with my family as usual.
On Saturday, we ordered a delicious food and had a fun time.
and on Sunday, i played soccer with my local friends and scored 2 goals.
These kind of things make me mentally and physically healthy so i can get the energy to get back to work.
I'm planing to visit my parents' place to make kimchi (called kimjang).

We make a lot of kimchi for winter and stored it in refri during the winter season.
Usually, the whole family gathers to make kimchi and shared it.
After finishing it, I'm going to drink with father-in-law and brother-in-law.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Well done, Mr. Yun. I almost forgot it is kimjang season again. Time flies really fast. I hope you have a great time making kimchi this coming weekend. Have a good night. See you in class tomorrow. ~Jane c",)


I had a great time with my family as usual.
>> CORRECT

On Saturday, we ordered a delicious food and had a fun time.
>> On Saturday, we ordered delicious food and had a fun time.

and on Sunday, i played soccer with my local friends and scored 2 goals.
>> And on Sunday, I played soccer with my local friends and scored 2 goals.

These kind of things make me mentally and physically healthy so i can get the energy to get back to work.
>> These kinds of things make/ keep me mentally and physically healthy so I can refresh my energy/ I can recharge to get back to work.

I'm planing to visit my parents' place to make kimchi (called kimjang).
>> I'm planning to visit my parents' place to make kimchi (called kimjang).

We make a lot of kimchi for winter and stored it in refri during the winter season.
>> We make a lot of kimchi for winter and store it in the refrigerator/fridge during the winter season.

Usually, the whole family gathers to make kimchi and shared it.
>> Usually, the whole family gathers to make kimchi and shares it.

After finishing it, I'm going to drink with father-in-law and brother-in-law.
>> After finishing it, I'm going to drink with my father-in-law and brother-in-law.


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