¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-10-29 478

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Fast food is known for unhealthy food. It contains unnecessary nutrients that destroy human;s immune system. It is also known for food which contain too much calorie that might be resulted on obesity. There are numerous fast food such as burger, pizza, and convenience food. I would like to state about convenience food mainly for single people. We can easily buy these food at the market due to the increase of demand. Modern society have changed everything. People believe that it's more convenient than they used to be but most people are living under the busy schedule everyday. There are countless e-mails that have to be checked, heavier working condition because of the automation. It leads people to have their meals quickly. The development of fast food market is the result of hectic life.
Packing materials are main problem that cause environmental destroy. Most fast food are delicious and convenience but it cause a lot of social problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang! Thanks for always responding to your essays! Even if you're getting busier these days, you still manage your time! Great weekend ahead!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Fast food is known for unhealthy food. 
>>> CORRECT
It contains unnecessary nutrients that destroy human's immune system.
>>> CORRECT
 It is also known for food which contain too much calories that might be resulted to obesity. 
>>> CORRECT
There are numerous fast food such as burger, pizza, and convenient food. 
>>> CORRECT
I would like to state about convenient food mainly for single people. 
>>> CORRECT
We can easily buy these food at the market due to the increase of demand. 
>>> CORRECT
Modern society has changed everything.
>>> CORRECT
 People believe that it's more convenient than they used to be but most people are living under their busy schedule everyday. 
>>> CORRECT
There are countless e-mails that have to be checked, heavier working condition because of the automation. 
>>> CORRECT
It leads people to have their meals quickly.
>>> CORRECT
 The development of fast food market is the result of hectic life.
>>> CORRECT
Packing materials are main problem that cause environmental destroy. 
>>> Packing materials is the main problem which causes environmental destruction. 
Most fast food are delicious and convenient but it causes a lot of social problems.
>>> CORRECT

PLEASE CHECK CONVENIENCE VS. CONVENIENT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112141 Do you enjoy learning about other countries\' customs? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-23 2
112140 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-23 601
112139 Homework ½Å*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-23 0
112138 This time, you need make your owncalendar, Tell us the name À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-23 1
112137 Do you like inviting friends in your house? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-09-23 449
112136 ielts task 2 part 2 ÀÌ*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 438
112135 ielts task 2 part 1 ÀÌ*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 853
112134 My Chuseok holidays. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 0
112133 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 2
112132 Wring1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 506
112131 Wring1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 758
112130 Wring1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 392
112129 What important things you should always check these days? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 511
112128 speaking-3rd ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 488
112127 speaking part2 ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 438
112126 Grammer review test ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-21 698
112125 Music is vital for me ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 475
112124 Make a sentence using the words below: Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 0
112123 Why is English fluency significant for you? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 418
112122 Make 3 sentences each for EDIBLE and POTABLE. ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04