¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My favorite vacation

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-11-04 389

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was 23, I have been travel with my friend at Kotakinabalu Malaysia.
During 2 week, that travel is my favorite memory.
It's my first time in forever free trip.
We were met so many friends, and ate delicious food.
And just resting so cool with my best friend.
I want to go back that time.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:)

That sounds exciting! 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

When I was 23, I have been travel with my friend at Kotakinabalu Malaysia.
>> When I was 23, I traveled with my friend to
 Kotakinabalu, Malaysia.

During 2 week, that travel is my favorite memory.
>> Our 2-week stay was my favorite. 

It's my first time in forever free trip.
>> It's my first free trip. 

We were met so many friends, and ate delicious food.
>> We met so many friends and ate delicious food. 

And just resting so cool with my best friend.
>> I rested with my cool bestfriend. 

I want to go back that time.
>> I want to go back to that time. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111975 What are the traditional things that Koreans do during Chu Seok? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 465
111974 Sleeping ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 472
111973 page 62 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 512
111972 [Homework] What period of history would you like to go back and... Á¶*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 2
111971 page 53 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 574
111970 9.14 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 1
111969 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 720
111968 life without cell phone ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 505
111967 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 1
111966 Questions ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 1
111965 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 0
111964 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 0
111963 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 0
111962 Why do you think obesity is becoming such a problem in the... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 1
111961 Homework~~~~~~~~~!!!!! ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 468
111960 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 3
111959 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 490
111958 Homework 9.14 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 515
111957 61 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 537
111956 What kind of food reminds you of your childhood and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-14 509

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04