¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Affect bad effect to penguins

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-11-06 309

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think global warming affect lots of bad effects. Global warming makes the ice in north, and south poles melt. Penguins live on the ice land. But if the ice lands melt, then penguins lose their home. It makes penguins die. So global warming affects very bad effects to penguins.
(From now on, I'll write about scientific facts.)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel! You did an amazing job. Your reply is the perfect answer to the given question. I agree with what you wrote. You should only look for scientific facts. However, make sure you get your information from reliable websites. Alright? 

- Teacher Debbie


I think global warming affect lots of bad effects.
>> I think global warming has lots of bad effects.

Global warming makes the ice in north, and south poles melt. 
>> It makes the ice in the north and south poles melt. 

Penguins live on the ice land.
>> Penguins live on icy land.

But if the ice lands melt, then penguins lose their home.
>> However, if the ice melts, the penguins will lose their home.

 It makes penguins die. 
>> Penguins can die.

So global warming affects very bad effects to penguins.
>> Therefore, global warming has bad effects to penguins.

(From now on, I'll write about scientific facts.)
>> This is a good sentence. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115366 What preparation will you do before an interview to make a good... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 362
115365 What is your favorite Korean traditional game? Explain how this... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115364 If you can invent something, what would it be? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115363 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 807
115362 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 2
115361 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 2
115360 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 160
115359 Yunnori ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 663
115358 What is your favorite place in your city and why? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 2
115357 How do you try to spice up your weekend? Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 825
115356 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1
115355 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 808
115354 ESSAY: Many jobs require ongoing training and research to stay... ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 616
115353 Make 5 sentences using your and 5 sentences using you\'re. Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 349
115352 What greetings annoy you? Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 872
115351 Tell me about your favorite food. ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 703
115350 What do you consider about a place/apartment/accommodation to... ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 427
115349 Vaccine pass enforcement at cram schools, study rooms suspended À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1
115348 Koreans drawn to unhealthy bread À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1
115347 Celltrion\'s COVID-19 candidate treatment shows safety in... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04