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Homework form the lesson on Nov 8th, 2021

작성자: 조*비
2021-11-09 449

회원님의 영작문



What was the most important thing your parents ever taught you?

When I was a freshman in high school, I had a friend. We thought each other as besties, and would hang out all the time after school. However, after she moved away and was transferred to another school, the stressful time began. I would receive a call almost every night, with her sobbing, saying that her new classmates are mean. It must have been a hard time for her, but it was stressful for me as well, to answer a call, expecting it to be another one of her complaining, crying, and self-pitying. I couldn’t reject her, because I pitied her too. Despite my expectation that she would stop soon, the situation repeated itself until I got into the university. One day, after hearing her scream-crying without even saying “hello”, I finally snapped. I spoke in a cold and insensitive manner to her before blocking her phone number.
Though I have not regretted cutting her off, one thing I have regretted is not having handled the

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Eunbee! Thank you for doing your homework. The overall content of your work is comprehensible. However, you have to focus on punctuation marks. 


-Debbie


What was the most important thing your parents ever taught you?

When I was a freshman in high school, I had a friend. 
>> This is a good sentence. 
OR
>> When I was a high school freshman, I had a friend.

We thought each other as besties, and would hang out all the time after school.
>> We thought of each other as besties and would hang out all the time after school.

However, after she moved away and was transferred to another school, the stressful time began.
>> However, after she moved away and transferred to another school, the stressful time began. 

I would receive a call almost every night, with her sobbing, saying that her new classmates are mean.
>> I would receive a call almost every night, with her sobbing, saying that her new classmates were mean.

It must have been a hard time for her, but it was stressful for me as well, to answer a call, expecting it to be another one of her complaining, crying, and self-pitying.
>> It must have been a hard time for her, but it was stressful for me as well: to answer her call, expecting that she would be complaining, crying, and pitying herself.

I couldn’t reject her, because I pitied her too.
>>  I couldn’t reject her because I pitied her too. 

 Despite my expectation that she would stop soon, the situation repeated itself until I got into the university.
>> Despite my expectation that she would stop soon, the situation continued until I got into the university.

One day, after hearing her scream-crying without even saying “hello”, I finally snapped.
>> One day, after hearing her scream-like crying without even saying “hello,” I finally snapped.

I spoke in a cold and insensitive manner to her before blocking her phone number.
>> This is a good sentence.

Though I have not regretted cutting her off, one thing I have regretted is not having handled the situation maturely.
>> This is a good sentence.
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