¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Netflix

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À¯*Áø
2021-11-13 297

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The Squid Game is one of the most famous movies in the world.
According to the "New York Times" , the movie has been thought
unhappy by North Korean Government because it depicts a fictional
game show that has deadly consequences. K-pop has become increasingly
popular in North Korea with tens of thousands of North Koreans having
access to it almost exclusively through the black market.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Jin!

It is great to read from you once again here on the composition page. Squid Game is a very meaningful drama. Not only that presents human nature to survive, but it also the reason why they need to. So with the 111 million people who watched it in the world, as well as all those who support K-pop, these are excellent forms of entertainment.

Kindly go over the explanations and suggestions I made below. This is a very good piece of writing. Keep it up!

See you in class soon.

-T. Donna =)

The Squid Game is one of the most famous movies in the world.
>> Squid Game is one of the most famous tv series in the world.
EXPLANATION: We do not need "the" before Squid Game as you can see in the original title, it doesn't have it.  This is a very tricky rule in English. You have to memorize if you need to use it or not because there is always an exception to the rule.

According to the "New York Times" , the movie has been thought
unhappy by North Korean Government because it depicts a fictional
game show that has deadly consequences. 
>> Correct!
Or: ... by the North Korean Government...
EXPLANATION: We need "the" before North Korean Government to mean that it is a specific kind of government. Most countries' governments need to have "the" for this pattern. For example: the South Korean government, the Vietnamese government, 

K-pop has become increasingly
popular in North Korea with tens of thousands of North Koreans having
access to it almost exclusively through the black market.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112126 Grammer review test ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-21 708
112125 Music is vital for me ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 481
112124 Make a sentence using the words below: Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 0
112123 Why is English fluency significant for you? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 420
112122 Make 3 sentences each for EDIBLE and POTABLE. ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 1
112121 page 20 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-19 571
112120 about of my favorite soccer player ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-09-19 1164
112119 What item do you love to shop? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 713
112118 What values are important to your family? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 1
112117 What is the longest friendship that you have had? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 1
112116 9.17 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 1
112115 How has inflation affected you? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112114 Why English is hard??????? ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 497
112113 page 12 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 633
112112 My Parents\' Job ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 462
112111 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 725
112110 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 532
112109 What do you do when you are running low with money? Answer in a... ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 2
112108 5 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 560
112107 65 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 557

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04