¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the common crimes committed in South Korea and how do you think should be lessened?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*ÁÖ
2021-11-18 573

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are the common crimes committed in South Korea and how do you think should be lessened?

Our country doesn't have a lot of crime.
Recently, crimes of child abuse is increasing every year. It is emerging the social problem.
It is difficult to deal with an individual family problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Monica:)

I actually heard about that and I feel really bad for those children. I hope they can get the justice that they deserve. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Our country doesn't have a lot of crime.
>> CORRECT

Recently, crimes of child abuse is increasing every year. 
>> Recently, crimes on child abuse is increasing.

It is emerging the social problem.
>> It is an emerging social problem. 

It is difficult to deal with an individual family problem.
>> It is difficult to deal with individual family problems. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114975 How is the law enforcement in your city? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 218
114974 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114973 favorite tale À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 175
114972 homework: Where do you usually meet new people? ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 862
114971 Where do tortoises live? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114970 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114969 12/21 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1413
114968 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 4728
114967 Have you heard of \"Golden Hello\"? What if a company offers you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 422
114966 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1
114965 food waste ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 422
114964 What do you and your family like to do together? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114963 What do you think will happen if North Korea and South Korea are... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 411
114962 What kind of cars do you think look the best? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114961 What do you do in order to minimize the use of plastic? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114960 What is the best memory you have in school? Explain in detail. Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 377
114959 NIce!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 349
114958 I don\'t want to be famous ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 180
114957 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 660
114956 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 983

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04