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I think adopting pets are much better

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-11-19 306

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, adopting pets are much better than buying pets. I'll cite two reasons why my opinion is.
First, adopting pets can save our money. Pet shop wants to earn money, so they sell pets expensive prize. Adopting pets is free, and the result is same with buying pets.
Second, our feeling is better when we adopt pets than buy pets. It's because when we buy pets, we don't feel 'I rescued the pets!'. But adopting pets makes us proud.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel! You did a great job! You delivered your ideas in an orderly way. Keep it up! However, be careful with these words-price and prize. Price is the amount of money you have to pay for something while prize means award. 

-Teacher Debbie

In my opinion, adopting pets are much better than buying pets. 
>> In my opinion, adopting pets is much better than buying pets. 

I'll cite two reasons why my opinion is.
>> I'll cite two reasons why this is my opinion.

First, adopting pets can save our money. 
>> This is a good sentence.

Pet shop wants to earn money, so they sell pets expensive prize. 
>> Pet shops want to earn money, so they sell pets at a higher price.
 
Adopting pets is free, and the result is same with buying pets.
>> Adopting pets is free, and the result is the same as buying pets.

Second, our feeling is better when we adopt pets than buy pets. 
>> Second, our feeling is much better when we adopt pets than when we buy pets. 

It's because when we buy pets, we don't feel 'I rescued the pets!'.
>> It's because when we buy pets, we don't feel, "I rescued these pets!"

 But adopting pets makes us proud.
>> However, adopting pets makes us proud.
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