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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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1121

작성자: 김*진
2021-11-21 492

회원님의 영작문

Combating climate change needs considerable investment and strengthened climate laws and policies. I have interested in environmental issues since I was a college student. After graduating from college, I focused on studying how international environmental regulations effect businesses and environmental management strategies at Graduate School of Climate Specialisation. During the project, I became interested in Carbon Capture and Storage (CCS) technology. The use of fossil fuels among global energy consumption is expected to keep increasing, but the technology can help the energy transition from fossil fuels to a green energy. For further studying, I studied CCS risk management system in China for my master’s dissertation. Nonetheless, I realised that it is infeasible for all fossil-fuel industries to use CCS technology due to many reasons like technology levels and political conflicts. Therefore, I wondered how other businesses deal with state’s climate-change measures.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you fo writing this Ye Jin! Keep it up! - Teacher Ivy

Combating climate change needs considerable investment and strengthened climate laws and policies.

>> Correct

I have interested in environmental issues since I was a college student.

>> I have been interested in environmental issues since I was a college student.

After graduating from college, I focused on studying how international environmental regulations effect businesses and environmental management strategies at Graduate School of Climate Specialisation.

>> After graduating college, I focused on studying how international environmental regulations affects businesses and environmental management strategies at Graduate School of Climate Specialisation.

During the project, I became interested in Carbon Capture and Storage (CCS) technology.

>> Correct

The use of fossil fuels among global energy consumption is expected to keep increasing, but the technology can help the energy transition from fossil fuels to a green energy.

>> The use of fossil fuels among global energy consumption is expected to keep on increasing, but the technology can help the energy transition from fossil fuels to a green energy. 

For further studying, I studied CCS risk management system in China for my master’s dissertation.

>> Correct

Nonetheless, I realised that it is infeasible for all fossil-fuel industries to use CCS technology due to many reasons like technology levels and political conflicts.

>> Nonetheless, I realised that it is not feasible for all fossil-fuel industries to use CCS technology due to many reasons, like technology levels and political conflicts.

Therefore, I wondered how other businesses deal with state’s climate-change measures.

>> Therefore, I wondered how other businesses deal with State climate-change measures.

 

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