¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*ÀÓ
2021-11-22 495

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Have you failed on something before?

--> Of course. I have failed in my business area. While doing my business, I did not reach the goals I had planned many times.
However, I was growing gradually through many failures, and I was able to reach my goal as I grew little by little.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Bo Im!

A job well done here on your answer! As you can see, all of your sentences are correct and your answer is candid. What matters the most when we make our goals is to keep pushing through no matter what. Before you know it, you are already there.

See you in class for a very meaningful discussion!

-T. Donna =)

Of course. I have failed in my business area. 
>> Correct!
Or: Of course, I have failed in my business area. 

While doing my business, I did not reach the goals I had planned many times.
>> Correct!

However, I was growing gradually through many failures, and I was able to reach my goal as I grew little by little.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113654 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 2
113653 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 2
113652 Punctuality ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 497
113651 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 3
113650 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 0
113649 What is the best public transport to you? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 709
113648 What I do in spring and summer ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 375
113647 job ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 294
113646 How do you keep in touch with your relatives and friends? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 1
113645 Tell me about your favorite food. ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 464
113644 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 335
113643 Korea\'s big problem ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 348
113642 What do you like most about teaching? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 0
113641 10.29 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 1
113640 Do you have any collections? Tell me about it, ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 349
113639 HOMEWORK ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 363
113638 Help me teacher Mayleen Á¤*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 6
113637 What would you do if you had more free time? Why? ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 292
113636 What do people in your country usually do on Pepero Day? Should... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 1
113635 Tell me the most interesting place in your country. ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-11-07 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04