¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people say that \"money makes the world go around.\" Do you agree? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼±*
2021-11-24 366

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are two sides to Money; bad and good effects. To live a life, money is a must, and also money can be a monster. To gain social services and goods for life, we use money as means. It means we cannot get anything without money. When we buy and sell using money as means, we struggle to get money. It leads to making social nets, makes the world go around. For example, farmers produce crops and then sell them to buy the TV. Technicians make TV to buy products and retailers sell them to save money at the bank for the future. Likewise, social activities are interconnected, and money is like oil to circulate the net. In contrast, when we share the money equally, we are satisfied with our possession, but we are allowed to have more, we try to have as many as possible. In this case, money is changed into a monster because we forget for a moment that humans value over money. That¡¯s why we need to be wise and altruistic in terms of money.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Miss Jung!
WOW! I'm pretty amazed by this thought. You are indeed right!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and answering the question.
====================================================
There are two sides to Money; bad and good effects. 
>> Correct! 
To live a life, money is a must, and also money can be a monster. 
>> Correct! 
To gain social services and goods for life, we use money as means. 
>> Correct! 
It means we cannot get anything without money. 
>> Correct! 
When we buy and sell using money as means, we struggle to get money. 
>> Correct! 
It leads to making social nets, makes the world go around.
>> Correct!  
For example, farmers produce crops and then sell them to buy the TV. 
>> Correct! 
Technicians make TV to buy products and retailers sell them to save money at the bank for the future.
>> Correct! 
Likewise, social activities are interconnected, and money is like oil to circulate the net. 
>> Correct! 
In contrast, when we share the money equally, we are satisfied with our possession, but we are allowed to have more, we try to have as many as possible. 
>> Correct! 
In this case, money is changed into a monster because we forget for a moment that humans value over money. 
>> Correct! 
That¡¯s why we need to be wise and altruistic in terms of money.
>> Correct! 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113202 Strong Power of Body Language Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 438
113201 How often would you say you get a good night\'s sleep? ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 433
113200 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 431
113199 Writing Task: Elections aren\'t the only way to change the... ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 2
113198 Do you think a high English language proficiency level is needed? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 552
113197 Should the fashion industry use models that look more like... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 1106
113196 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 1
113195 Hang out ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-23 1
113194 Homework from the lesson 10212021 Á¶*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-23 423
113193 Do you spend money on your hobby? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-23 2
113192 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-23 432
113191 Not to be included important information À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-23 552
113190 Journal ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-23 390
113189 Which is better: dating for a short time or a long time before... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 2
113188 Do you think there would be less illness in the future? À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 450
113187 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 1
113186 Fill in the blanks with suitable prepositional phrases ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 402
113185 My dad ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 340
113184 I want to be strong and healthy ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 393
113183 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-22 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04