¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can change one of your personalities, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-11-30 1114

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Actually, I don't want to change my personalities.
Before, I thought that some of my personalities are bad so I have to change them.
But now, I think I fixed some of them, and I think that my personalities are great so I don't need to change them.
I made a lot of friends because of my personalities, so I don't need to change my personalities.
What I have to do is keep my personalities and love my self.
Also I think the attitude that loving our personalities is very important in our lives.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John :) 

That's true. Our personality defines who we are so we have to accept it. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

Actually, I don't want to change my personalities.
>> CORRECT

Before, I thought that some of my personalities are bad so I have to change them.
>> CORRECT

But now, I think I fixed some of them, and I think that my personalities are great so I don't need to change them.
>> CORRECT

I made a lot of friends because of my personalities, so I don't need to change my personalities.
>> I made a lot of friends because of my personalities so I don't need to change them. 

What I have to do is keep my personalities and love my self.
>>  CORRECT

Also I think the attitude that loving our personalities is very important in our lives.
>> I also think that loving our personalities is very important in our lives. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116014 Talk about your best memory from a holiday ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 1
116013 What do you think is interesting about your culture? À±*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 0
116012 What is your favorite tradition in South Korea? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-01-29 846
116011 Essay (Jan 28th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 731
116010 ielts task 1 ¼Û*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 756
116009 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 412
116008 What is your favorite tradition in South Korea? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 464
116007 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 619
116006 Do you think it is best to argue or just walk away? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 518
116005 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 367
116004 What motivates you to keep working? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 818
116003 Is it important to have a goal? Why or why not? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 581
116002 Food chain boosts profile on back of BTS member\'s... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 0
116001 More people turn to lady luck amid pandemic À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 0
116000 Number of discouraged workers in Korea hits new high in 2021 À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 1
115999 Who is the best and worst president of South Korea? Explain why. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 957
115998 Who is the best and worst president of South Korea? Explain why. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 0
115997 Attitude before Argument ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 909
115996 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 1
115995 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-28 827

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04