¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

if i can change my personality

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Çù
2021-12-01 326

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I can change one of my personalities, it is perfect to everything.
This personality can work perfectly without mistakes when i am woking on it.
Sometimes I get so stressed out.
Habits that i always check and check sometimes make my body and mind tired.
It can't be easily fixed, but if I can change it, I want to change my personality and live.
But I think it helped a lot when I made plans or prepared for my itinerary.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Evan:) 

Being a perfectionist has advantages and disadvantages. My advice for you is balance this personality of yours. :) You don't necessarily have to get rid of it. Just pick situations where this trait would be suitable. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

If I can change one of my personalities, it is perfect to everything.
>> If I can change one of my personalities, it would be being a perfectionist. 

This personality can work perfectly without mistakes when i am woking on it.
>> This personality of mine it when I want to work without making mistakes. 

Sometimes I get so stressed out.
>> Sometimes I get so stressed out because of this trait of mine.

Habits that i always check and check sometimes make my body and mind tired.
>> I have this habit that I always check something multiple time resulting to my body and mind getting exhausted, 

It can't be easily fixed, but if I can change it, I want to change my personality and live.
>> It can't be easily fixed, but I am willing to try to make my life better. 

But I think it helped a lot when I made plans or prepared for my itinerary.
>> But I think that at some point, this personality of mine helped me when it comes to planning and preparing my itineraries. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114054 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 1
114053 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 3
114052 1122 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 1
114051 1122 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 1
114050 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 421
114049 Who always notices first when you make a mistake? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 1
114048 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 488
114047 What is the importance of being on time? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 1
114046 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-22 356
114045 1121 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 362
114044 11.19 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 0
114043 11.18 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 0
114042 Healthy eating ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 1
114041 How would you deal with an angry or irate customer? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 486
114040 How would you deal with an angry or irate customer? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 339
114039 Before corona pendemic ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 372
114038 I recommend ttaeok-bok-ki :) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 280
114037 If I will go America ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-21 641
114036 Voice phishing ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-20 1
114035 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-20 316

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04