¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Birth day is my special day.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-12-01 647

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My special day is my birth day. My birth day is like anniversary about me. At that time, I had been always happy because there were people that celebrated my birth. It means they love me. I can depend on people who love me. Then, I feel comfortable just people who love me are exist. However, if the people who celebrate my birth day are not exist, it means there are no people who love me, so I will be very sad. Therefore, I always have to thank for God just that people are exist.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Daniel!  Your homework is well-organized and easy to understand. Good job! However, remember to use pronouns to replace nouns in your sentences.

I am glad that you appreciate the people who love you and that you are thankful for them.

- Teacher Debbie


My special day is my birth day. 
>> My special day is my birthday.

My birth day is like anniversary about me.
>> It is like my anniversary.

 At that time, I had been always happy because there were people that celebrated my birth. 
>> During that time, I am always happy because there are people who celebrate it with me.

It means they love me. 
>> This is a good sentence.

I can depend on people who love me.
>> This is a good sentence.

Then, I feel comfortable just people who love me are exist. 
>> I am thankful that they exist.

However, if the people who celebrate my birth day are not exist, it means there are no people who love me, so I will be very sad. 
>> If they didn't, nobody could love me, and I would be very sad.

Therefore, I always have to thank for God just that people are exist.
>> Therefore, I always have to thank God for them.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114973 favorite tale À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 195
114972 homework: Where do you usually meet new people? ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 920
114971 Where do tortoises live? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114970 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114969 12/21 ³ë*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1458
114968 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 4767
114967 Have you heard of \"Golden Hello\"? What if a company offers you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 481
114966 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 1
114965 food waste ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 429
114964 What do you and your family like to do together? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 2
114963 What do you think will happen if North Korea and South Korea are... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 421
114962 What kind of cars do you think look the best? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114961 What do you do in order to minimize the use of plastic? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-23 0
114960 What is the best memory you have in school? Explain in detail. Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 400
114959 NIce!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 376
114958 I don\'t want to be famous ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 198
114957 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 688
114956 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 1006
114955 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 120
114954 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-22 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04