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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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essay about\"If you could be invisible for a day what would you do and why?\"

작성자: 김*서
2021-12-06 132

회원님의 영작문

If I became invisible, than I will became blind. So it wouldn't be that much fun that I expected when I didn't knew the truth.
(That thing about becoming blind, it's because when retina became invisible than you could not see anything!)
But, just think we can see even though we are invisible, it must be very fun!
I can make some people frightened,(I make someone frightened when I'm not invisible)
I can prank without getting caught, also I can do some of the things which I was not allowed to do.
such as staying awaken after midnight, reading books in the dark, watching videos all night, eating sweets will be one of them.
And if I became invisible, I can pretend I can't see and forget about the homework!(thinking about it, I have to watch many videos, so I can't lie about that.)Plus I can forget about the school! because people will think it's kind of weird that clothes are walking by itself.
I think being invisible will be a great thing to be (Just not like the hollow man, for real!)

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, YoonSuh!

Oh, that's funny! So, you enjoy pranking other people!  Well, you can actually do whatever you want if you're invisible.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts about this!

~T. Roanne ^_^

If I became invisible, than I will became blind. 
>> If I became invisible, then I will become blind. 
So it wouldn't be that much fun that I expected when I didn't knew the truth.
>> So it wouldn't be that much fun than I expected when I didn't know the truth.
(That thing about becoming blind, it's because when retina became invisible than you could not see anything!)
>>That thing about becoming blind, it's because when retina became invisible then you could not see anything!
But, just think we can see even though we are invisible, it must be very fun!
>> Correct! 
I can make some people frightened,(I make someone frightened when I'm not invisible)
>>I can make some people frightened, I make someone frightened when I'm not invisible.
I can prank without getting caught, also I can do some of the things which I was not allowed to do.
>> Correct! 
such as staying awaken after midnight, reading books in the dark, watching videos all night, eating sweets will be one of them.
>>Such as staying awake after midnight, reading books in the dark, watching videos all night, eating sweets will be one of them.
And if I became invisible, I can pretend I can't see and forget about the homework!(thinking about it, I have to watch many videos, so I can't lie about that.)
>> And if I became invisible, I can pretend I can't see and forget about the homework! Thinking about it, I have to watch many videos, so I can't lie about that.
Plus I can forget about the school! because people will think it's kind of weird that clothes are walking by itself.
>> Plus, I can forget about the school because people will think it's kind of weird that clothes are walking by itself.
I think being invisible will be a great thing to be (Just not like the hollow man, for real!)
>> I think being invisible will be a great thing to be. Just not like the hollow man, for real!
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