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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Funeral Sermon 2

작성자: 류*선
2021-12-07 138

회원님의 영작문

Sometimes things happen that we don’t fully understand.
We know that life is not perfect. And we all have experienced that our lives and the world are broken. It means we all have committed sins and we have sinful nature.
What we have earned for all our sins is separation from God,
But our encouragement is that one day, all of our hurt and pain can be over, and we can spend all eternity in paradise.
Jesus Christ came to this earth and died to give us a gift. And friends, it is a gift that gives us hope. We receive eternal life through putting our faith and our trust in Jesus.
God can take us from our situation and bring us to a place of rest where we can lie down beside quiet waters where our souls can be refreshed.
[Name of deceased] made Jesus the Lord of [his/her] life, and because of that, [he/she] could know how what David meant in Psalm 23 saying, Friends, we must realize in the midst of this time of mourning that there is good news! That through Jesus, death is not the end.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

I will still keep working on the last page, Han! See you!-Faith-
Sometimes things happen that we don’t fully understand.
>> CORRECT
OR Some things happen that are beyond our comprehension.
We know that life is not perfect. And we all have experienced that our lives and the world are broken. 
>> We know that life is not perfect and we all have experienced that our lives and the world are broken. 
OR Life is perfectly imperfect and we all experience the cruelty of this broken world.
It means we all have committed sins and we have sinful nature.
>> CORRECT
What we have earned for all our sins is separation from God,
>> What we have earned for all our sins is separation from God.
OR The outcome of our sins is misery.
But our encouragement is that one day, all of our hurt and pain can be over, and we can spend all eternity in paradise.
>> But our encouragement is that one day, our hurt and pain can be over, and we can spend all eternity in paradise.
OR But we hold on to our hope that all of our sufferings will vanish eternally in paradise.
Jesus Christ came to this earth and died to give us a gift. 
>> CORRECT
OR Jesus came down from heaven and laid down His life for us.
And friends, it is a gift that gives us hope. 
>> CORRECT
OR And my dear friends, Christ's life is a gift and in His life, we can find hope.
We receive eternal life through putting our faith and our trust in Jesus.
>> CORRECT
God can take us from our situation and bring us to a place of rest where we can lie down beside quiet waters where our souls can be refreshed.
>> God can take us from our situation and bring us to a place of rest where we can lie down beside quiet waters where our souls can be refreshed.
OR Our God is Mighty that He can take us away from this chaotic world and bring us beside the still waters to rest.
[Name of deceased] made Jesus the Lord of [his/her] life, and because of that, [he/she] could know how what David meant in Psalm 23 saying, Friends, we must realize in the midst of this time of mourning that there is good news! 
>> [Name of deceased] made Jesus the Lord of [his/her] life, and because of that, [he/she] could know what David meant in Psalm 23 saying, "Friends, we must realize in the midst of this time of mourning, there is good news!"
That through Jesus, death is not the end.
>> CORRECT
OR That through Jesus, death is not the end of our story.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
114072 Homework {11/22} 차*빈 완료 2021-11-22 217
114071 What is the most time-consuming thing you do in your life? 김*은 완료 2021-11-22 2
114070 Around me 민*정 완료 2021-11-22 1
114069 What is your proudest accomplishment so far this year? 류*주 완료 2021-11-22 179
114068 When is drinking alcohol a vice? 이*람 완료 2021-11-22 4
114067 Monday homework 류*우 완료 2021-11-22 415
114066 Homework 윤*임 완료 2021-11-22 294
114065 Homework 강*선 완료 2021-11-22 230
114064 What is your most important goal next week? 김*묵 완료 2021-11-22 390
114063 My school homework 김*환 완료 2021-11-22 1295
114062 Especially, It has two questions today~~ 신*섭 완료 2021-11-22 224
114061 Homework 권*미 완료 2021-11-22 1
114060 What is your proudest accomplishment so far this year? 여*진 완료 2021-11-22 1
114059 Do you think things will go back to the way they used to before... 여*진 완료 2021-11-22 0
114058 Nonregular jobs incerase faster in 5 major cities 유*진 완료 2021-11-22 1
114057 Homework 권*미 완료 2021-11-22 1
114056 What is the most interesting city to visit in your country? Why? ye*nhi 완료 2021-11-22 1074
114055 DonQuixote 권*희 완료 2021-11-22 205
114054 Homework 함*주 완료 2021-11-22 1
114053 e-mail correction 박*광 완료 2021-11-22 3

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