¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you believe in lucky charms? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-12-07 161

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

As a result, I don't believe in any lucky charms.
I am interested in science, and there are many kinds of logics in it.
But the lucky charms are not according to any science parts.
The lucky charms are what people made because they need to trust, and I think believing my own religion is much better than believing the lucky charms.
So I don't believe in any luck charms, and also I don't want to.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

As a result, I don't believe in any lucky charms.
>> I don't believe in lucky charms. 

I am interested in science, and there are many kinds of logics in it.
>> I am only interested in Science where there are a lot of logics. 

But the lucky charms are not according to any science parts.
>> Lucky chams don't  have any logical explanations to it. 

The lucky charms are what people made because they need to trust, and I think believing my own religion is much better than believing the lucky charms.
>> Lucky charms are made by people for their security. I think having a religion is better than believing in luck. 

So I don't believe in any luck charms, and also I don't want to.
>>So I don't believe in any luck charms, and I also don't want to.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114433 How can stress be good, useful, or necessary? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 150
114432 wow/... I will keep trying!!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 153
114431 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 104
114430 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 150
114429 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 336
114428 Korea\'s low birth rate. ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 393
114427 What do you think are the responsibilities of a mother to her... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 123
114426 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 301
114425 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 0
114424 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 0
114423 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 0
114422 Folk Story About Moon Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 165
114421 What is your happiest moment? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 226
114420 Are these sentences grammatically correct? °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 175
114419 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 161
114418 Was this year better or worse than last year? How come? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 151
114417 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 329
114416 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 403
114415 What will you do on your next vacation? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 2
114414 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-03 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04