¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you believe in lucky charms? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-12-07 280

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

As a result, I don't believe in any lucky charms.
I am interested in science, and there are many kinds of logics in it.
But the lucky charms are not according to any science parts.
The lucky charms are what people made because they need to trust, and I think believing my own religion is much better than believing the lucky charms.
So I don't believe in any luck charms, and also I don't want to.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

As a result, I don't believe in any lucky charms.
>> I don't believe in lucky charms. 

I am interested in science, and there are many kinds of logics in it.
>> I am only interested in Science where there are a lot of logics. 

But the lucky charms are not according to any science parts.
>> Lucky chams don't  have any logical explanations to it. 

The lucky charms are what people made because they need to trust, and I think believing my own religion is much better than believing the lucky charms.
>> Lucky charms are made by people for their security. I think having a religion is better than believing in luck. 

So I don't believe in any luck charms, and also I don't want to.
>>So I don't believe in any luck charms, and I also don't want to.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114761 Advantage and disadvantage of video conferencing application ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 315
114760 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 318
114759 Water is vital to living things ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 284
114758 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 235
114757 Regrets for my life. ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 283
114756 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 295
114755 the meaning of my birthday ¹Ú*Çù ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 546
114754 Report-3 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 566
114753 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 291
114752 Report-2 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 414
114751 Report-1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 758
114750 Homework {12/15} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 314
114749 Are you a competitive person? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 2
114748 What are the qualities of a good leader? A bad leader? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 301
114747 Next year resolution ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 260
114746 The educational system ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 3
114745 What do you eat when you feel sad? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 5013
114744 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 251
114743 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 0
114742 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-12-15 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04