¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Saving electricity is very important.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-12-07 222

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Saving electricity is very important. These days, electricity became vital energy. We can't use computer, phone, or lantern. These things are vital things to our lives. We can't study in night, and lots of jobs which use computer will disappear. Like this, electricity became vital energy to our lives. Then, we have to save this energy to use it after century. So, we should learn how to save electricity such as unplugging, or turn off lights. It can save lots of energy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel!  Your reply is the perfect answer to the given question. Superb! However, please focus on articles and prepositions. 

- Teacher Debbie


Saving electricity is very important. 
>> This is a good sentence.

These days, electricity became vital energy.
>> These days, electricity is becoming vital energy.

We can't use computer, phone, or lantern. 
>> We can't use computers, phones, or lanterns without it.

These things are vital things to our lives.
>> These things are vital for our lives.

 We can't study in night, and lots of jobs which use computer will disappear. 
>> We can't study at night, and lots of  jobs which use computers will disappear without electricity.

Like this, electricity became vital energy to our lives. 
>> Hence, it is vital.

Then, we have to save this energy to use it after century. 
>> We have to save energy so that we can still use it after a century,

So, we should learn how to save electricity such as unplugging, or turn off lights. 
>> We should learn how to save electricity by unplugging appliances or turning off lights.

It can save lots of energy.
>> This is a good sentence.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113815 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 158
113814 Homework ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 214
113813 What career opportunities are there for the younger generation... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 695
113812 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 175
113811 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 197
113810 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 249
113809 1112 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 223
113808 Respect ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 259
113807 What is the difference between families 30 years ago and today? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 202
113806 What did you realize after watching the recording today? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 171
113805 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 261
113804 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 2
113803 Writing task: How can you fight discouraging thoughts about... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 0
113802 Do you like eating fruits and vegetables? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 175
113801 Which is always the best part of your day? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 1
113800 Why I disagree about boy got a long hair. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-12 173
113799 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 228
113798 homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 190
113797 Do you think people who are 12-17 years old should already get... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 0
113796 1111 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04