¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Spring:The Season of Life and hope

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿µ
2021-12-10 417

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is hard for me to say It's spring that is the most beautiful season (since I prefer winter), but It is. Before spring, a lot of lifes have hard time with cold weather. When spring comes, for those who passed through painful time comes out to the world and prepare to start their dance of life. This feels like a story of hope to me. For this reason, spring is the most beautiful season.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Justine!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


It is hard for me to say It's spring that is the most beautiful season (since I prefer winter), but It is. 

>> It is hard for me to say that spring is the most beautiful season, since I prefer winter, but it is. 

Before spring, a lot of lifes have hard time with cold weather. 

>> Before spring, a lot of lives go through a hard time with cold weather. 

When spring comes, for those who passed through painful time comes out to the world and prepare to start their dance of life. 

>> When spring comes, for those who went through painful times, comes out into the world and prepare to start their new dance of life. 

This feels like a story of hope to me. 

>> CORRECT!

For this reason, spring is the most beautiful season.

>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
116300 Why I like saturday. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 573
116299 Writing Task (Feb 9th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 858
116298 2/10 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 604
116297 Homework ¼Õ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 610
116296 Do you forgive people easily when they did something bad to you?... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 506
116295 homework(1) Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 516
116294 homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 0
116293 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 1149
116292 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 970
116291 Affect of newspaper ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 689
116290 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 654
116289 WRITING ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 663
116288 WRITING ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 1
116287 WRITING ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 0
116286 Writing ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 0
116285 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 430
116284 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 579
116283 The Plant-based meat ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 2
116282 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 1
116281 What is the worst news you\'ve ever heard in South Korea?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-02-10 827

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04