¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Spring:The Season of Life and hope

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿µ
2021-12-10 366

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is hard for me to say It's spring that is the most beautiful season (since I prefer winter), but It is. Before spring, a lot of lifes have hard time with cold weather. When spring comes, for those who passed through painful time comes out to the world and prepare to start their dance of life. This feels like a story of hope to me. For this reason, spring is the most beautiful season.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Justine!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


It is hard for me to say It's spring that is the most beautiful season (since I prefer winter), but It is. 

>> It is hard for me to say that spring is the most beautiful season, since I prefer winter, but it is. 

Before spring, a lot of lifes have hard time with cold weather. 

>> Before spring, a lot of lives go through a hard time with cold weather. 

When spring comes, for those who passed through painful time comes out to the world and prepare to start their dance of life. 

>> When spring comes, for those who went through painful times, comes out into the world and prepare to start their new dance of life. 

This feels like a story of hope to me. 

>> CORRECT!

For this reason, spring is the most beautiful season.

>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
115383 homework ¹®*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 540
115382 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1046
115381 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 553
115380 Homework~~~^^ °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 529
115379 What genre of book do you enjoy most? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 415
115378 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1136
115377 Is there someone in this room you¡¯re thankful for? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 2
115376 What can transform a person\'s business to a higher level? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1548
115375 homework Àü*¾÷ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 363
115374 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115373 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 1
115372 What would you do if you could no longer contact the person who... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 559
115371 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115370 What would you do if you could no longer contact the person who... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 931
115369 Do you think gardening is good for your health? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115368 Homework {01/07} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 793
115367 What preparation will you do before an interview to make a good... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115366 What preparation will you do before an interview to make a good... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 394
115365 What is your favorite Korean traditional game? Explain how this... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0
115364 If you can invent something, what would it be? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-01-07 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04