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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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서비스 입니다.

What are three skills or traits you wish you had (that are useful for your work)?

작성자: 문*현
2021-12-11 159

회원님의 영작문

The first skill is to improve my understanding of financial products. Even though my major was international finance, I concentrated most of my studies on banking structure. After graduating from the university, I took some online courses in the prestigious institute to fill the gap in my knowledge, and now I would like more practical experience. The second skill is more understanding of the technology software. I worked in the data-driven environment, but it was limited to providing clients' solutions based on data analysis. I would like to proceed more as a data analyst to consolidate and visualize the datasets. Finally, I would like to develop charisms and learn to say no to customers' demands. Concentrating too much on increasing customer presence allowed me to increase revenue to 50%, I barely reject customer demand even when tasks go beyond my work scope. Accordingly, I would like to learn how to reject politely to customers.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thanks for this Aciel!

The first skill is to improve my understanding of financial products. 
>>>  correct  
>>> OR: The first skill is to improve my understanding on financial products.   
Even though my major was international finance, I concentrated most of my studies on banking structure. 
>>> correct  
After graduating from the university, I took some online courses in the prestigious institute to fill the gap in my knowledge, and now I would like more practical experience. 
>>> correct    
The second skill is more understanding of the technology software. 
>>> correct  
>>> OR: The second skill is more understanding on the technology software.  
I worked in the data-driven environment, but it was limited to providing clients' solutions based on data analysis. 
>>>  correct   
I would like to proceed more as a data analyst to consolidate and visualize the datasets. 
>>>  correct   
Finally, I would like to develop charisms and learn to say no to customers' demands. 
>>> Finally, I would like to develop charisma and learn to say no to customers' demands.  
Concentrating too much on increasing customer presence allowed me to increase revenue to 50%, I barely reject customer demand even when tasks go beyond my work scope. 
>>> correct   
Accordingly, I would like to learn how to reject politely to customers.
>>> correct  
>>> OR:  Accordingly, I would like to learn how to reject  customers politely.
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