¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Bithday is special day:)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-12-14 410

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was very young, I feel birthday is so special day. Now it's just normal.
A few days ago it's my birthday, but I'm just celebrating my birthday with only my mother.
Next day of birthday, my best friends came my home, and celebrate one more time.
It's very adorable and thankful.
But it was fun, but I don't have as much expectation for my birthday as when I was young.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

Birthdays are great. It's a day meant to celebrate your existence in this world. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

When I was very young, I feel birthday is so special day. 
>> When I was very young, I felt that birthday are so special day. 

Now it's just normal.
>> Now, it's just normal. 

A few days ago it's my birthday, but I'm just celebrating my birthday with only my mother.
>> A few days ago, it was my birthday, but I just celebrated it with my mother. 

Next day of birthday, my best friends came my home, and celebrate one more time.
>> The next day, my best friends came my home and we celebrated one more time. 

It's very adorable and thankful.
>> It's very adorable and I felt thankful. 

But it was fun, but I don't have as much expectation for my birthday as when I was young.
>> It was fun, but I don't have as much expectation for my birthday as when I was young.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113662 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 414
113661 What do you do to stay healthy? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 3
113660 Do you think being a professional dancer would be a good job? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 1
113659 My siblings ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 1
113658 Is your personality suited to your job? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 2
113657 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 367
113656 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 369
113655 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 334
113654 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 2
113653 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 2
113652 Punctuality ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 500
113651 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 3
113650 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 0
113649 What is the best public transport to you? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 715
113648 What I do in spring and summer ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 383
113647 job ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 294
113646 How do you keep in touch with your relatives and friends? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 1
113645 Tell me about your favorite food. ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 469
113644 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 347
113643 Korea\'s big problem ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-08 371

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04