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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Why do you think people enjoy mountain climbing despite it being tiring?

작성자: 금*진
2021-12-15 133

회원님의 영작문

I thought about the reason for a while. In my case, I hate mountain climbing when I was young. However, the older I’m getting, the more I like it. There are some reasons.
I think the biggest reason is that we can exercise outside. We can’t work out in the gym these days because of Coronavirus so many people enjoy outside activities in nature like going hiking or camping. We feel more secure and comfortable in nature, not in inside space.
Next, we can get a sense of accomplishment when we reach the summit of a mountain. I can look at beautiful scenery at the top of the mountain as well. So, I recommend it when you have lots of worries or feel depressed and stressed.
Lastly, mount climbing is good for health. We can use lots of calories by doing it and breathe fresh air from many trees. In Korea, the fine dust is really serious these days so we feel better in the mountain or forests.
I think that going hiking is the best hobby for health these days.

mountain climbing=go hiking Right?

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Miss Chloe. Actually, I have enjoyed mountain hiking recently this year.

I thought about the reason for a while. 
>> correct
In my case, I hate mountain climbing when I was young. 
>> correct
>>> OR: In my case, I hated mountain climbing when I was young. 
However, the older I’m getting, the more I like it.
>>correct 
There are some reasons.
>> correct
I think the biggest reason is that we can exercise outside. 
>> correct
We can’t work out in the gym these days because of Coronavirus so many people enjoy outside activities in nature like going hiking or camping. 
>> correct
We feel more secure and comfortable in nature, not in inside space.
>> correct
>> OR: We feel more secure and comfortable in nature, not in an indoor space.
Next, we can get a sense of accomplishment when we reach the summit of a mountain. 
>> correct
I can look at beautiful scenery at the top of the mountain as well. 
>> correct
So, I recommend it when you have lots of worries or feel depressed and stressed.
>> correct
Lastly, mount climbing is good for health. 
>> correct
We can use lots of calories by doing it and breathe fresh air from many trees. 
>> correct
>> OR: We can burn lots of calories by doing it and breathe fresh air from many trees. 
In Korea, the fine dust is really serious these days so we feel better in the mountain or forests.
>> correct
I think that going hiking is the best hobby for health these days.
>> correct

mountain climbing=go hiking Right?
>> Yes, they are very similar. However, there is a slight difference. Mountain climbing has a much more wider range in meaning. It may involve hiking, rock climbing, as well as crossing glaciers. However, for mountain hiking, it basically means going up or walking up a mountain.
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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
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04

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