¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Next year resolution

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-12-15 406

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is December. Unbelievable!!
Time is so fast and every new years my resolution is same.
This year become better than last year.
2021's my purpose is join in to big company musical, but I can't.
I believe next year I can do it.
But I'm so proud my self everyday everytime:)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

Those are great achievements! I am very proud of you as well. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

It is December. Unbelievable!!
>> CORRECT

Time is so fast and every new years my resolution is same.
>> Time flies so fast and all of my new year's resolutions are the same. 

This year become better than last year.
>> This year ahs become better than last year. 

2021's my purpose is join in to big company musical, but I can't.
>> My purpose this 2021 was to join a big musical company but I didn't. 

I believe next year I can do it.
>> I believe that next year I can do it. 

But I'm so proud my self everyday everytime:)
>> Regardless of that, I am still proud of myself everyday. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113284 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 414
113283 Competition ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 548
113282 what are your favorite leisure sports? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 555
113281 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 515
113280 Please correct the sentence I made À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 774
113279 Skip breakfast ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 1
113278 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 512
113277 Thank you ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 2
113276 dreamtime story À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 10
113275 4 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 467
113274 writing ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 571
113273 writing ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 730
113272 What culture in South Korea are you most proud of? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 0
113271 What do people usually do during the winter season there in... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 442
113270 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 464
113269 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 518
113268 Would you describe your workplace as formal or casual? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 533
113267 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 538
113266 Middle child ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 388
113265 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04