¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Water is vital to living things

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-12-15 326

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Water is the most important resources for living things. It's because living things always have to drink water. It means water is vital to live. If people don't drink water three days in a row, then they die. It applies all of living things. Like oxygen, water is also vital resources for living things, so considering water that is vital is rightful.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel! You were able to use good expressions in your work. Very good! Just please remember to use pronouns to replace nouns in your sentences.


- Teacher Debbie

Water is the most important resources for living things.
>> Water is the most important resource for living things.

It's because living things always have to drink water.
>> It's because living things always need water.

It means water is vital to live. 
>> This is a good sentence.

If people don't drink water three days in a row, then they die. 
>> If people don't drink water three days in a row, they will die.

It applies all of living things.
>> It applies to all living things.
 
Like oxygen, water is also vital resources for living things, so considering water that is vital is rightful.
>> Like oxygen, water is also vital for living things, so we must conserve it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113989 HoMeWoRk ¾È*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 324
113988 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 730
113987 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 457
113986 Quick reply of your company about my Wensday class. ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 2
113985 Post on the bulletin board about my Wednesday ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 6
113984 Speak with ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 2
113983 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 369
113982 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 2
113981 Application ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 340
113980 Application ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 306
113979 Application ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 320
113978 What delicacies in South Korea would you recommend to a... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 439
113977 What delicacies in South Korea would you recommend to a... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 1
113976 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 751
113975 What are the important lessons that your parents have taught you? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 0
113974 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 1
113973 home work ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 361
113972 home work ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 809
113971 For Jisun Oral Test 3 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 409
113970 For Jisun Oral Test 3 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-18 411

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04