¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Water is vital to living things

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-12-15 436

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Water is the most important resources for living things. It's because living things always have to drink water. It means water is vital to live. If people don't drink water three days in a row, then they die. It applies all of living things. Like oxygen, water is also vital resources for living things, so considering water that is vital is rightful.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel! You were able to use good expressions in your work. Very good! Just please remember to use pronouns to replace nouns in your sentences.


- Teacher Debbie

Water is the most important resources for living things.
>> Water is the most important resource for living things.

It's because living things always have to drink water.
>> It's because living things always need water.

It means water is vital to live. 
>> This is a good sentence.

If people don't drink water three days in a row, then they die. 
>> If people don't drink water three days in a row, they will die.

It applies all of living things.
>> It applies to all living things.
 
Like oxygen, water is also vital resources for living things, so considering water that is vital is rightful.
>> Like oxygen, water is also vital for living things, so we must conserve it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113481 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 1
113480 How are sports beneficial to you? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 2
113479 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 1
113478 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 386
113477 Do you think ghosts are real? Why or why not? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 0
113476 If you are going to a Halloween party, what costume are you... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 0
113475 HOMEWORK ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 3
113474 What do you think is the hardest job in the world? Why do you... ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 510
113473 Kindly answer the following in essay form. Since it\'s Halloween... ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 9
113472 homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 532
113471 If you are going to a Halloween party, what costume are you... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 566
113470 My job ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 2
113469 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 477
113468 What are the disadvantages of reopening estabilishment under... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 2
113467 Homework from the lesson 11012021 Á¶*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 585
113466 Birthstone ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 802
113465 Howework ±Ç*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 2
113464 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 7
113463 Autumn season pictures ÃÖ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 1078
113462 Airline industry prepares to increase international filights... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-02 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04