¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Water is vital to living things

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2021-12-15 446

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Water is the most important resources for living things. It's because living things always have to drink water. It means water is vital to live. If people don't drink water three days in a row, then they die. It applies all of living things. Like oxygen, water is also vital resources for living things, so considering water that is vital is rightful.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daniel! You were able to use good expressions in your work. Very good! Just please remember to use pronouns to replace nouns in your sentences.


- Teacher Debbie

Water is the most important resources for living things.
>> Water is the most important resource for living things.

It's because living things always have to drink water.
>> It's because living things always need water.

It means water is vital to live. 
>> This is a good sentence.

If people don't drink water three days in a row, then they die. 
>> If people don't drink water three days in a row, they will die.

It applies all of living things.
>> It applies to all living things.
 
Like oxygen, water is also vital resources for living things, so considering water that is vital is rightful.
>> Like oxygen, water is also vital for living things, so we must conserve it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113385 homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 380
113384 What natural disaster do you fear the most? and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 685
113383 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 5
113382 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 327
113381 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 473
113380 homework Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 0
113379 Mermaids ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 720
113378 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 358
113377 Is \'amusement park\' the right word, or should it be... ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 1
113376 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 418
113375 why kids will helping parent\'s chores. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 430
113374 Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 497
113373 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 1
113372 What natural disaster do you fear the most? and why? ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 376
113371 Is having a goal in life effective in becoming successful? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 2
113370 How do you catch one\'s attention in business? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 326
113369 Licenses ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 761
113368 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 3
113367 Are you always prepared? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 1
113366 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-29 569

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04