¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What will be your New Year\'s Resolution this coming new year?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-12-16 599

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My resolution of this coming new year is 'Let's be a good person.'.
I can't judge myself about me but I think I am not a bad person.
But I want to be a better person because I think I am not enough.
Actually, being a better person is one of the hardest things in this world.
We can all change but it is hard to change to a person who I want to be.
It is really hard to achieve, but it isn't impossible.
So I want to be a better person and also I want to make new friends.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:) 

Being a good person is indeed hard but not impossible. This is actually a great resolution. All your good deeds will flourish. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

My resolution of this coming new year is 'Let's be a good person.'.
>> My resolution for this coming new year is to be a good person. 

I can't judge myself about me but I think I am not a bad person.
>> I can't define who I am by judging myself but I am not a bad person. 

But I want to be a better per
on because I think I am not enough.
>> CORRECT

Actually, being a better person is one of the hardest things in this world.
>> CORRECT

We can all change but it is hard to change to a person who I want to be.
>> CORRECT

It is really hard to achieve, but it isn't impossible.
>> CORRECT

So I want to be a better person and also I want to make new friends.
>> So I want to be a better person and I also want to make new friends.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113444 oh...........It was wasteful......... ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 401
113443 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 629
113442 Homework ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 475
113441 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 478
113440 What public transport do you like the least and why? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 3
113439 ¼÷Á¦ Á¤*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 596
113438 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 520
113437 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 739
113436 If you can spend a day with a famous person, who would you pick... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 512
113435 Other countries ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 3
113434 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 588
113433 Homework📝 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 790
113432 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 960
113431 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 633
113430 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 522
113429 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 490
113428 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 1
113427 What is the best quality of a leader? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 408
113426 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 1
113425 For Jisun Oral Test 2 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 751

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04