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Kids don\'t have to go to malls, how to compose(1)

작성자: 김*우
2021-12-16 218

회원님의 영작문

In my opinion, kids don't need to go to the mall because their parents can buy. So, even the time is COVID-19, It's better not to go there. Also, there will be a lot of people in it, kids will be more in danger when they go to the mall.
Other text;​
Composing can feel very hard and it is the subject that only genius can do. But, it isn't. Then, I will explain how to compose.
First, you have to find or create simple melody. This simple melody will be verse and chorus. Like River flows in you, the simple melody is A G# A G# A E A D. It will be come verse and chorus. Later you will have to develop this melody.
Second, you have to create chord in harmony with the simple melody. In the case of River flows in you, the chords are F#m, D, A, and E. These chords are in harmony with the melody.
(I will explain other stage next time.)

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Daniel! Thank you for doing your homework! However, you have to study more on different sentence patterns and grammatical structures.


- Teacher Debbie

In my opinion, kids don't need to go to the mall because their parents can buy. 
>> In my opinion, kids don't need to go to malls because their parents can buy them what they need.

So, even the time is COVID-19, It's better not to go there. 
>> We are still in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic, so it's better not to go to one.

Also, there will be a lot of people in it, kids will be more in danger when they go to the mall.
>> There are a lot of people in malls, so kids will be in danger if they go there.


Wow! Thank you for sharing these steps, Daniel! I think I'll try my hands at composing music.

DIARY

Composing can feel very hard and it is the subject that only genius can do. 
>> Composing can be very hard, and you might think it is something that only a genius can do. 

But, it isn't. 
>> However, it isn't.

Then, I will explain how to compose.
>> I will explain how to compose music.

First, you have to find or create simple melody. 
>> First, you have to find or create a simple melody. 

This simple melody will be verse and chorus. 
>> This simple melody will be the verse and the chorus. 

Like River flows in you, the simple melody is A G# A G# A E A D.
>> Like in River Flows in You, the simple melody is A G# A G# A E A D.

 It will be come verse and chorus.
>> It will become the verse and the chorus.

 Later you will have to develop this melody.
>> This is a good sentence.

Second, you have to create chord in harmony with the simple melody.
>> Second, you have to create a chord that will be in harmony with the simple melody.

 In the case of River flows in you, the chords are F#m, D, A, and E. 
>> In River Flows in You's case, the chords are F#m, D, A, and E. 

These chords are in harmony with the melody.
>> This is a good sentence.

(I will explain other stage next time.)
>> I will explain the other steps next time.
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