¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My dream vacation

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-12-16 365

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My dream vacation is trip go to the Southeast Asia.
Usually vacation season, I have been Southeast Asia country for travel with my best friend.
2 years ago, I went Malaysia kotakinabalu.
It it my best memory of best.
I can't forget beautiful sea view and most best thing is take a rest in hotel.
Just in hotel, but it's different feeling at Korea.
I don't know reason, anyway my dream vacation is go to the trip other country.
My favorite places is Southeast Asia.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann:) 

Countries here in Southeast Asia are the best. The tourist spots are exquisite! I hope you can go here in the Philippines again. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise

My dream vacation is trip go to the Southeast Asia.
>> CORRECT

Usually vacation season, I have been Southeast Asia country for travel with my best friend.
>> Usually I go to countries in the Southeast Asia with my bestfriend during vacation season. 

2 years ago, I went Malaysia kotakinabalu.
>> 2 years ago, I went to Kotakinabalu, Malaysia .

It it my best memory of best.
>>It is the best memory that I have. 

I can't forget beautiful sea view and most best thing is take a rest in hotel.
>> I can't forget the beautiful view of the sea and the best part is  resting in the hotel.. 

Just in hotel, but it's different feeling at Korea.
>> It may be just in a hotel but it has a different feeling compared to the ones in South kroea. 

I don't know reason, anyway my dream vacation is go to the trip other country.
>> I don't know the reason and still, my dream vacation is to go on a trip in another country.

My favorite places is Southeast Asia.
>> My favorite places are in Southeast Asia.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113872 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 2
113871 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 314
113870 Black sheep ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 442
113869 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 383
113868 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 416
113867 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 634
113866 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 346
113865 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 605
113864 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 3
113863 My teachers ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 363
113862 What did you do last weekend? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 466
113861 Why do you think couples do not have children in your country... ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 383
113860 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 416
113859 What wishes do you have for your family members? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 363
113858 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 271
113857 How do you think you could reduce stress or prevent stress in... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 293
113856 If you are very busy at work or at school, do you have ways to... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 330
113855 How do you ask for help? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 0
113854 Which among your things is hard for you to throw away? Why? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 1
113853 Artic À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-15 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04