¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I want to change my curtain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-12-17 285

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want change my room curtain.
Korea is four season country.
And now it's December, very cold outside.
My room cutain so thin, and then my room temperature is so low.
And my favorite color is white, I want change my room curtain like white thick curtain.
Now my curtain color is so dark green, atmosphere like too dark:(

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ann :) 

Oh, you can easily change that. I think changing it to white can really brighten up your room. :)

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

-Teacher Elise
I want change my room curtain.
>> I want change my room's curtain.

Korea is four season country.
>> South Korea has four seasons. 

And now it's December, very cold outside.
>> Since it is December, it is very cold outside. 

My room cutain so thin, and then my room temperature is so low.
>> My room curtain so thin, and my room's temperature is so low.

And my favorite color is white, I want change my room curtain like white thick curtain.
>> My favorite color is also white so I want to change my curtain to a thick white curtain. 

Now my curtain color is so dark green, atmosphere like too dark:(
>> Now, my curtain is dark green which makes my room too dark.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113429 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 294
113428 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 1
113427 What is the best quality of a leader? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 233
113426 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 1
113425 For Jisun Oral Test 2 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 325
113424 For Jisun Oral Test 1 ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 336
113423 Music ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 247
113422 Do you think people rely too much on technology nowadays? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 0
113421 How do you loosen up? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 1
113420 slim\'s book À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 3
113419 If i have a spend a time with famous person ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 372
113418 Tell me about your favorite sports. ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-01 0
113417 It is often thought that the increase in juvenile crime can be... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 324
113416 What are the endangered animals in your country? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 302
113415 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 382
113414 Have you ever volunteered to help victims of natural disasters?... ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 256
113413 My favorite restaurant ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 1
113412 What natural disaster do you fear the most? and why? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 698
113411 Advertisements of the e-mail À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-31 215
113410 If you can spend a day with a famous person, who would you pick... ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-10-30 305

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04